[OliviaB]

I'm asking because my in-laws are wanting to come visit with us for Thanksgiving and Christmas. I have no problem with this, but they have two very out of control mini schnauzers. They have no money to board them so they are wanting to bring their dogs with them. They would be crated, but honestly they drive me crazy with their constant yapping and hyperness. Also, the male is very dog aggressive but my in-laws are clueless. They think that his behavior is cute and do nothing to stop it. They also have asked many times to let Gunner meet them and play with them, but obviously that's NOT happening. Gunner is not dog aggressive, but if their male terrier challenges him, I know what would happen. Okay, so my question is...should I allow them to bring the dogs and just deal with it for a few days, or is there something I should be concerned about regarding Gunner? Even if we keep them separate, could having another aggressive male dog in his home and using his yard cause issues? I want them to come visit, but I really dread dealing with those dogs. I also know that they are clueless though and won't understand my reasoning for wanting them to stay at home.

 

[OliviaB]

If it were me, I would just pay to board their dogs for them. Seems like a nice gesture and saves you the hassle.

I wish we could do that, but they are not caught up on vaccines (I know...don't get me started on that lol) so we would have to pay for both of them to get caught up, two dogs to board for two weeks, and any other expenses that might come up. Honestly, I'm just not willing to do that. We were against them getting the dogs to begin with because they are first time dog owners, chose two terriers at once, and don't have the money to care for them. I will do what I can I guess if they do bring them here, but I'm just not prepared to pay a huge amount for two dogs that aren't even mine. Plus they are coming again in December and would expect us to do it again.

 

[OliviaB]

Hm, I've dealt with aggressive small dogs (pekes and other asian breeds) and gating off sections of the house works. Maybe let them have the guest room or hallway, while Gunner has free run, or rotate to put him in his crate in your room?

If they do come, I would probably insist that they be crated most of the time. They bark CONSTANTLY and would drive Gunner crazy. The male has no problem going after another dog and won't stop because he's been taught no manners and has zero training. I just feel like it would be chaos. I'm willing to try it because I do want our family together...I just need to figure out how to work things to minimize the stress. My first priority is Gunner and keeping him happy.

 

[OliviaB]

Thanks everyone. I really am leaning towards telling them "No." Even if they stay in the crate, they will bark constantly and essentially drive me crazy. I really don't want my holidays ruined because of two little yappy gremlins. I also know that it would likely stress Gunner out having them around, and like someone else said, this is his home. He has a right to be safe and comfortable here, and those dogs are not my problem. They bought them a few years ago from a BYB and didn't listen to anything I tried to tell them. Now they want to throw a pity party by saying they really want to visit but would have to bring their dogs. I welcome family anytime, but I'm probably going to have to get firm and tell them to either find a pet sitter, or stay at home I hate being in this situation, but I don't think I have much choice.

 

[OliviaB]

Is there a way you can say yes, with the understanding that it will be a crate situation pretty much exclusively? Maybe use some structured walks with them, without your boy, to "help" and bounce around some thoughts on training? Not in a "this dog is a terror" kinda way, but more of a "wow, he's so energetic and smart!. Let's see if we can teach him a few tricks (sit, heel, etc)"

I'm not a yappy dog fan, they are SO annoying. But then, so are in laws ;-) neither are going away, so make the best and try to guide the situation as best you can.

I could, but they yap NONSTOP when crated. And you know a little terrier yap...my ears would be ringing for days My husband and I have tried ever since they got them (4 years ago) to help them with training or at least some manners, but my MIL refuses. She looks at them as her babies, and gets pissed at us if we try to stop a bad behavior. Last time I visited them, the male was jumping all over my toddler and knocking him down. I corrected him, and she got pissed at me and said he was just trying to say Hi. She humanizes them to the point that she can't see anything wrong with what they do. It's beyond frustrating, but not my problem I guess.
Oh, and I'm with you. I can't stand a yappy dog! Probably why I'm not a small dog person

 

[OliviaB]

It's frustrating because I know that if I was allowed to work with them for a bit or at least treat them like a dog instead of a human baby, I could probably get them to be at least somewhat tolerable. BUT, their owners (mostly my mother in law) refuses to allow me to do anything with them. My father in law really doesn't like them and has said many times he would give them away in a heartbeat but he can't because of his wife. They drive him crazy too I think.

 

[OliviaB]

Thanks again for the replies I'm glad most people agree that it's probably not a good idea...didn't want to feel like I was being mean or anything. I'm genuinely concerned for the safety of the dogs and also for the quality of the visit.

Gunner NEVER goes to their house. Actually since we got him, he's been my excuse not to go

As far as little dogs, allow me to clarify. I think that if raised correctly, little dogs can be wonderful and don't have to be yappy and annoying. Unfortunately, the majority of people with small dogs treat them like babies or don't take their behavior issues seriously, thus turning them into yappy little furballs. I don't blame the dog though as they are only a product of how the human raises them. I also know that there are exceptions to this rule. BUT, where my inlaws are concerned, they have ruined their dogs to the point that they are so obnoxious most people can't stand to be around them.

 

[OliviaB]

I agree with 'No'. I think you may need to play your big stick - you said one of your children has special needs and I would play that out to mean that dogs he doesn't know very well and who aren't very calm are a no-no. I don't want to upset you, but often dogs will react poorly to children who have disabilities of the physical kind and some autistic children who act unexpectedly can cause dogs to react poorly. Gunner is maturing along with your children and is conditioned to accept what goes on (I really don't know if anything goes on of course), but that would be my line.

That's a VERY good idea! Landon loves dogs but can often get too hyper with them. With Gunner he's fine because Gunner is so easy going and laid back. With the terriers, I know that they would just feed off of each other and it could get dangerous. The male has snapped at Landon before without much warning...he's just unstable in general. The female is a lot calmer, but fearful and doesn't appreciate a rowdy child. I also wonder if Gunner would get protective in that situation. Obviously not a situation I want to tempt, but it could be another excuse to tell them No.

 

[OliviaB]

Depends how ugly this makes the relationship (having small dogs without manners having free run of the house), esp when DH is not there to intervene or help with the house rules. I for one would not tolerate someone's yapping dog in my house running around with bad behavior. But then I have many reasons why people would not choose to bring their dogs to my house. Pity that Daria has passed, she was my greatest ally in that regard - just ask Bean, DR or Jenny .

Another good point....my husband won't be home for Thanksgiving, so that visit I'll be doing it all on my own. I think for my own sanity, the dogs are definitely not coming then. They want to stay a week...I would probably go bald from pulling my hair out

Christmas my hubby will be home (hopefully!) and the visit will be only a couple of days so I may consider it then IF they keep the dogs crated and are fully aware of the rules beforehand. I will just have to get firm and explain that in my house, the dogs have rules. If you can't help me enforce them, then leave them at home. My MIL will pout but she'll get over it.

 

[OliviaB]

I know it could be very uncomfortable to say no, and if you do, you should be kind but very honest - their dogs are not well trained or socialized, and that jeopardizes the integrity of your household. But if guilt and obligation take over, I would say that crating alone is not enough - you would do best to insist that the dogs be crated IN THE GUEST ROOM, so that their yapping and antics don't over-excite the entire household. Maybe, sequestered, they might even settle down. Your in-laws could spend hours walking them if they liked, but when in your home, the dogs would be out of sight. Not loose in the room, of course - you'd probably have to reconstruct it! In a boarding facility, they'd be in kennels anyway, or crates. good luck!!

Thanks for the suggestions Unfortunately, my house isn't that big and even if closed up into the guest bedroom, we would still be able to hear them...it's the first bedroom that's closest to the main living area. From past experiences with them, if they are crated and can't see their owners, they go NUTS. I'm talking screaming, yapping, peeing...it's ridiculous. I'm just going to have to be firm and tell them No, and if they get mad, oh well. It's my house and I don't want it destroyed and the holidays ruined. We've tried to help them with those dogs countless times but every time they refused. Sooo....now that the dogs are completely out of control, dog aggressive, and overall extremely annoying, I don't really feel bad for banning them.

 

[OliviaB]

I've dogsat enough, and fostered enough dogs, that keeping dogs separate isn't a big deal to me anymore. I have a 4-bedroom house with human occupants only in one bedroom, though. We have tall baby gates up on two of the spare rooms, and we have no issues with rotating dogs in and out. The puppy I'm watching right now was pretty bad about crying in her crate for the first week or so, but I just used it as an opportunity to crate-train her. She's quite good now, and I just had to ignore her for a week or so. I just dogsat for a lady who hangs a spray bottle with vinegar/water on her dogs crates specifically to stop unwanted barking. :lol:

Anywho, to me it's a question of how badly you want to see your in-laws. It sounds like you don't really care enough to deal with their dogs, and that's fine - I certainly don't blame you! I'm not fond of my boyfriend's parents and would NEVER go out of my way to help them in a way that meant they'd end up at my house. :lol: If it were my own mother or a good friend, I'd feel completely differently.

Lol, well this may sound bad, but honestly it really doesn't matter to me either way. They are nice enough but very eccentric and quite messy. The biggest thing is that my kids are very attached to them and would be sad if they didn't come. But, my kids could also be in danger with those dogs if they were to come, so I'm kind of stuck. In the past they've been able to leave them with friends, but for some unknown reason none of the past dog sitters want to do it anymore. Can't imagine why?! So now they basically say that either they bring the dogs, or they can't come. Going to visit them isn't likely either as their house is tiny and that still leaves the dog situation...just at a different place. Ugh. I could always board Gunner I guess, but that seems wrong too. It's his house and I want him here with us for the holidays. I don't know. They only live 3 hours away so maybe I can get them to just come up for one day or something and leave the dogs at home...