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How do your dogs deal with grief

  • do they go quiet and keep to themselves

    Votes: 13 86.7%
  • do they bark more

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • do they just want to rest or want to sleep more

    Votes: 4 26.7%
  • do they become more aggressive for their protection

    Votes: 0 0.0%
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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Heidi our 8 yr old Dobermman has just lost her best firend. Becks was 4 yrs old and passed away on Tuesday from DCM. Sadly Heidi also lost Baron (male Doberman of 12 yrs) in late 2008.
I would love to hear your suggestions on how to make her life as normal as possible. Heidi was part of the sad loss of Becks' passing and also part of the burial process in our garden. We believe that Heidi knows Becks has gone but
unfortunately Heidi is just walking around the garden barking, as if she is calling for Becks, as usually Heidi would bark a certain way and Becks would come running. Heidi's demeanour is sad and moping like around the house
I do try not to let Heidi see me being upset, as she is very intuitive like most Dobermans.
My first thoughts are to take her out for long walks and to the beach as often as we can, but this is not normaly what we do. We live on acreage and try to take the dogs out for a drive and walk at least once per week to a different place. Our property is fully fenced so there is a huge area to wak around. I would take them for walks in the property 3 times or more daily, but do I need to take Heidi to different places. I work from home, which I also chose to do for the dogs as well.
I would love to hear your recommendations and also how you coped with a similar loss leaving a remaining dog on their own with no other canine play mates.
Thank you, Kim.
 

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I just lost my 4 yr old male barely 2 weeks ago as well. I can't really say that Fei had an extended grieving period. I would suggest just walking your property as usual with just your girl. I'm sure she will find great comfort in that.
 

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So sorry to hear about your loss. My Dobe Jack lost his sibling ( 9 years old ) to DCM October 14, 2011. He spent about 2 weeks running on the deck looking down into the kennel for Bubby. I started taking him on long runs ( 1 to 2 hours ) off leash in the woods to bring him around...but I was just guessing at what to do. It's the human grief I often have difficulty with. I still miss Bubby...and Gunner...and Rainbow. : (
 

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Monster got very quiet, cuddly, and all-around typically depressed. She slept a lot, just moped around the house, etc, for a good couple of weeks.. but it could have been partially due to how we all reacted as well.
 

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Nexus would wander around and look for Mysti, in her usual places, her bed, the back yard, the computer room and she would come to me and whine when she couldnt find her. I just tried to keep her routine as normal as possible, and talked to her ALOT, but I think that was more for my peace of mind as I still to this day miss Mysti like hell.
It didnt take Nexus long to recover and start being normal again but she was pretty young also.
 

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When Toby lost his adoptive mum he went into a terrible depression as did my 2 Terriers and like you it really worried me. It took weeks and weeks for them all to come round, but Toby more so, (guess because she was his mum). The only light at the end of the tunnel for a long time was the playdates he had with my friends dogs, they didnt know of his loss and bounced around and picked him out of his doldrums within minutes.

So I guess my suggestion would be to try and find your girl someone she can play with, share some time with.
 

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Really sorry for your loss and Heidi's. I lost a boxer years ago and my min schnauzer wouldn't eat or drink anything for days.He would just lay in the spot our boxer always laid. We took him to the vet who told us to get another dog( which we were not planning on at all) . It did bring him out of it but he may have snapped out of it on his own.
 

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I think each reacts in their own way. Monty was raised by Petey but he was only 17 months old when Petey passed away. Monty was there when Petey died suddenly and also when we buried him. He was definitely down for a little while. The day after Petey's death I decided to get both of us up and out. We hiked a lot, and Frisbee became his new passion. My suggestion is to keep her busy. Its good for you too.
 

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When My dobe was 2 we lost our cocker, molly, at 17 to old age. The dobe seemed to sense she was reaching that point and cuddled with her constantly. He was there when we put her down (vet came to us) and we let him smell her after she had passed. Then he layed down on the ground next to her, put his head up, and howled. I'de never even heard of a dobe howling before tha, and never saw him do it again. it was horribly distressing for me to see. After that he took about 3 weeks to really bounce back and move on. He just got alot more cuddly and clingy. I was greiving too, so I brought him along when I did things that helped me. hiking, going to the dog park, or just sitting on our porch swing and talking to him in a soothing voice. I'd say just give hiedi lots of love and time. She'll improve. Dogs, like people, grieve in their own time and way.
 

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Discussion Starter · #11 ·
Thank you all so very much for your kind thoughts and suggestions. I will try to follow Toby's Human suggestion and find some play mates for Heidi, perhaps I can join a walking club and also enquire with other doberman owners through our local vet.
Many thanks for your comments again, it really does help.
Best wishes from Brisbane, Australia.
Cheers Kim
 

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When dogs lose their best friends there is a process of grieving and each dog deals with it differently. When my dad passed away Devon would check on him daily. She would lay her head on his bed and dad would pet and talk to her. He would sit in his wheelchair on our back porch and Devon sit right with him . When he passed away she was laying in the floor............She still walks into my dads room and lays on his bed. Sometimes I'll go in and lay on the bed with her and talk to her about my dad.
 

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When dogs lose their best friends there is a process of grieving and each dog deals with it differently. When my dad passed away Devon would check on him daily. She would lay her head on his bed and dad would pet and talk to her. He would sit in his wheelchair on our back porch and Devon sit right with him . When he passed away she was laying in the floor............She still walks into my dads room and lays on his bed. Sometimes I'll go in and lay on the bed with her and talk to her about my dad.
That choked me up. Sorry for your loss.
 

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Hugs to you and your girl. I didnt vote, cuz we had a different experience. Julian paced. Incessantly. She'd settle, then get up and check the front windows, about every hour. For several weeks. between our grief and her missing buddy, it was too much. We resorted to Prozac for about a month for her. Til the day she died, 2 years later, we couldn't say "Roman" without her perking her ears up and scanning the room.

They do grieve, they also feed off the sorrow of their people. More walks helped... But not much in the first few weeks.
 

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Discussion Starter · #17 ·
Hi Cathy,
Thank you for your kind comments. So sorry for your loss also. Our pets are our best friends and give us so much joy and unconditional love.
Best wishes, Kim.
 

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I have never had 2 dogs, but the dog greiving process would be similar (I think) if one of the humans (in the family unit) died.
- each dog is either closer to the human Mom or human Dad

In 1977 we got our first dober pup, named Tanya...from breeders +80 y/o.
The bitch was sucky on the human dad while the wife said the stud dog was her's.
A year later the human dad died, and the FM dobe walked around the house always with Dads slipper in her mouth.
When she slept, always on the human bed, on Dad's side of the bed...always slept with Dads slipper in her mouth.
A year later, the elderly wife died, and the dobes were rehomed.
But the FM dobe, grieved 24/7 for human Dad...and that was for over a year.

KimS - Sorry for Heidi's loss...and broken heart.
I think some dogs can snap out of greiving, some can not...just depends on how strong the bond was with the deceesed (4 legged or human).
- our senior Amy, would whine for me terribly (untill she passed, I think), if I died before her...my wife has even said this
- in her 12th year, sometimes I think Amy has a will to live...just for her DaDa
So I don't think there is a fix, from a death sometimes...every situation is different.
 
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