Ahh, "The Bulwer Lyntton Fiction Contest (where www means Welcome Wretched Writers) "

I don't think I could even begin to compete. Here are the 2019 winners:

Winner:
"Space Fleet Commander Brad Brad sat in silence, surrounded by a slowly dissipating cloud of smoke, maintaining the same forlorn frown that had been fixed upon his face since he’d accidentally destroyed the phenomenon known as time, thirteen inches ago."
Maxwell Archer

Grand Panjandrum's Special Award:
"Emile Zola wandered the dank and soggy streets of a gloomy Parisian night, the injustice of the Dreyfus affair weighing on him like a thousand baguettes, dreaming of some massage or therapy to relieve the tension and pain in his aching shoulders and back, and then suddenly he thought of his Italian friends and their newly invented warm water bath with air jets and he rapturously exclaimed that oft misquoted declaration — "Jacuzzi!""
Robert R Moore

You have to admit that I have a long way to go. But maybe if I continue to practice by posting here, next year would be a possibility. Anyway, I've missed the June 30th cutoff date for this year.

That was sorta the point, I thought.

Well, I got up with the sun this morning. I rushed to the window and threw my shutters wide open, breathed in the soft cool morning air, admired the fresh greens of the young tree leaves rustling in the breeze and the sunlight sparkling in the dew, and burst into song!



How's that??

Well, I got up with the sun this morning. I rushed to the window and threw my shutters wide open, breathed in the soft cool morning air, admired the fresh greens of the young tree leaves rustling in the breeze and the sunlight sparkling in the dew, and burst into song!



How's that??

I'm not sure I've ever really seen pink lilies before?? I must have, but I can't remember when; all I think of when I think "lily" is Easter lily. But you can really see why day lilies are called lilies, when you compare them to these. The flowers do look very similar.

Incidentally, does anyone else have trouble spelling "lilies"? I never know if it is one "l' or two, and in typescript, the l's and i's run together so it looks wrong no matter what.

The missus' flowers look lovely. She has a way with plants, I think.

I should have said, one particular post that made me laugh out loud, which led into what I wrote at the end of mine

And yeah, unless she has to go potty, Mocha tends to hang out with us, wherever we are. She's always been that way, loves to be near her humans.



Thanks, Denny



Nice one, Ken! Did they ask for your phone number?

Well, I got up with the sun this morning. I rushed to the window and threw my shutters wide open, breathed in the soft cool morning air, admired the fresh greens of the young tree leaves rustling in the breeze and the sunlight sparkling in the dew, and burst into song!



How's that??

So who’s next for the BS challenge?

It's NOT too late to take preventative action for noise sensitivity!

This is one of the BEST posts ever on how to handle noise sensitivity in dogs. There's a what to do now if it's happening soon, and how to make it better in the future. Highly, highly recommend: https://illis.se/en/eliminating-fire...8spZhz89ZIsXNs

Yep! Hard to get the dogs out to do their business with all the fireworks going off around here.

I went over to my brother's house yesterday evening and as soon as the sun went down the fireworks began and his Pit, Leah, wanted nothing to do with outside anymore.

I sure hope the people around my house know what they are doing. I would hate to have to go through more trauma losing my house because of fireworks. We could use some rain, like right now!

Plus, I need something to mow!

Modm,

One of my Dobes who had no trouble passing the noise part of the WAE got more and more noise sensitive as he got older. I was close to an old dirt race track (long since gone now) and they had fireworks after every weekend racing and my poor dog was a mess over the noise.

I finally learned to take his bed and put it in my bedroom closet (that bedroom was at least on the other side of the house from the track and it cut the noise down somewhat) I did that before it got dark--shut all the curtains, turned on the television for some white noise and he and his bed lived comfortably on my shoes until it was all over.

ABTLH

On a farm , there is always some to do , or needs to be done . Yesterday I mowed the road sides , I try and keep them looking like our yard , it looks so good , short cut road sides right up tp the corn or beans - Damn people always throwing beer bottles out in them along with everything else - Hit a tire one time - Killed the motor on the tractor before I could get the bush hog raised up ! So when I see a car coming I stop and let it go by before mowing again - I have seen stuff fly out from the bush hog 50 feet or more , out into the field or shooting it across the road .

I seen this car coming and stopped - They were driving slow - So I could see them pretty well - they were 2 younger gals - really , they looked like SD's JD Gal - !! I stopped mowing again ! and they slowed down and stopped in front of the tractor - I thought - What now ? they got out of there car and I shut off the mow and tractor - I figured they must be lost and needed directions - I was wrong - LOL They said they were tried of sitting around there house and decided to take a drive - They work at a Fitness gym as instructors and have not been to work for ever because of the c-19 . They wanted to know how I stayed so fit ? They were amazed at my straight up and down build - perfect tan to boot - then they asked my age . I told them and they both said at the same time -- NO WAY ! and said I was kidding them ! I said sadly enough - that was my age . No way was there reply again ! I asked what made them think I would be kidding them ? They said that they have many at the gym half my age that is not even close to my looks and build ! Asked if I had any fitness advise for them to pass along to there students at class ? Told them I just get up early , work hard and the key was lots of curls ! 12 oz. curls to be exact , LMAO

Damn virus ! They asked if they could get a few pictures with me up real close and I had to tell them that was not a good idea that I practice the social distance guild lines ! They said when this is over that they would be back for them pictures ! I told them I would be looking forward to that day

So TN and 6-7 -- that's my entry for your BS contest ! : grin2:

That was cruel TN--posting the picture of the yummy looking brisket when I'm still stuck with eating no-chew stuff because of the missing molar and the hole it left must be protected. I sure looked good though--made me drool.

Denny, can't you just plug the computer in somewhere else. Or is that receptical the only one that handles internet? Mmmmm or is that the place you have to be to get reception.

LaDi--cracked me up, your description of Hoss zipping by where treats were hidden and having to go back and redo the scent areas. And yes, that was a really nice run-on sentence--and you all know I'm the past master of those so my opinion is actually worth something.

Let's see--what else is going on--not much at the moment--the loaner, Joey has a new behavior that will eventually drive me insane--because I won't hold toys and bones and stuff for him to chew on--he first worked out a system of balancing a couple of his favorite chew toys on one of the legs of the spider the chair at the desk has--and after I checked about a million times to make sure it wasn't the spider itself that he was chewing on he has revamped that system to include one of my feet in the holding position--he paws at me until I move my foot and then I find he has me pinned between a leg of the spider, his two big feet and the toy. Yesterday he took my slipper off to make this work better.

This dog is entirely too clever for his own good. Now to add to that list of things that Ken is collecting, that you say to new puppies, he can add my most recent two: "Let go of my slipper..." and "Stop pawing at my foot--I'm not helping you hold that wishbone no matter what you do..."

It's late enough I can go mow the danged lawns again--better than mowing ditches. We do appreciate your endeavors to keep the farm and field looking it's best though, Ken.

Happy 4th of July you all--be safe--don't blow any fingers off with fire crackers and no big parties and wash yer hands, this danged COVID-19 isn't through with us yet...

ABTLH

Still thinking .......but meanwhile I wanted everybody to know that Scott has completed weed wacking and has proclaimed it is now BEER THIRTY!