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  Topic Review (Newest First)
08-13-2012 06:08 AM
JobeyV OP, I followed your story about Lexie & found it heartbreaking, it reduced me to tears what you all went through. I lost my boy Homer to DCM about 3 weeks before you lost Lexie & can understand all too well the need to have a dobe in your life. We couldn't stand the empty house so we went back to our local dobe rescue & Trooper(rescue dobe no.4) came home with us. He has bought joy into our lives & given us something positive to focus on as we grieve for our boy. Margot is an absolute sweetheart & I hope she brings as much fun & love to your lives as Trooper has to ours.
08-13-2012 12:53 AM
missabaldwin
Quote:
Originally Posted by brw1982 View Post
If she didn't know any better, she didn't know any better. Me judging her and scolding her doesn't undo her buying from a BYB. But she's here now and she seems genuinely interested in understanding better breeding practices. That's far more than I can say for a LOT of noob's to the forum, or people I meet in general.

She's not being combative or defending her pup's breeder. She's a person who just had her heart broke by the loss of a great dog. I can empathize with that. I'm glad she found the forum and continues to seek information.

The desire to educate oneself tells me a lot about a person. There's a difference between that kind of individual and one that chooses to buy from a BYB, defends it in an abrasive manner, and then also chooses to insult show and working breeders at the same time while taking low blows at forum members.

If there's one thing I've learned in the last few years it's that I have a great appreciation for knowledgeable and experienced people who don't patronize others for not knowing what they do. I'm fortunate to know and have worked with some incredibly intelligent people who have accomplished great things in their field of work in their lifetime. And I am extremely humbled by the fact that they will talk openly to anyone and answer questions no matter how mundane and basic it may be to them. They recognize that while they are exceptional in their knowledge and expertise the rest of the world is not. They could be real @ssholes about it. But they're not. I have far greater respect for those individuals than others I've encountered in my education and work who are incredibly intelligent and experienced but are patronizing and treat others poorly for not easily knowing what they do. I'm by no means an expert on...well, anything LOL...but I'd rather be open with information I may have that others don't than be condescending to someone for not knowing exactly what I do and for not having the exact experiences I have. Knowledge should be easily found and shared. I firmly believe if the world, in general, were more educated we would not have but a fraction of the problems we currently do.

I guess that's my long-winded way of saying...Thanks! I'll take 'em.
BRW the brilliant. I couldn't have put it better myself. This deserves to be quoted again!
08-10-2012 01:44 PM
cbellphoto
Quote:
Originally Posted by KCFilley View Post
I love the name Margot. How did you come up with it. She is perfectly adorable. That face surely will win lots of new toys and stuffies.

So is Margot going with you on vacation?

Each time I lost one of my boys, I was lucky enough to know they were nearing their journey's end. I had to have another to fill that void that I knew was coming.

Hugs to Margot.
Thank you so much! When Justin and I were trying to think of names for the new pup, I basically just wanted to stay away from names that sounded even the least little bit like "Lexie" or "Lou" (Lexie's nickname). We tossed a few names around, including Margot, but really it all came down to nickname possibilities. Haha! All of my dogs have nicknames, some of which sound nothing like their actual name and I don't even remember how they came to be (Jocie's nickname is "Bobo" and Sam's nickname is "Samul.") Then, all of a sudden I remembered one of my favorite movie character names, Gogo (a 17 year-old Japanese bodyguard in the movie Kill Bill Vol. 1), and that basically sealed the deal for us chosing Margot as the puppy's new name.

Unfortunately, Margot cannot go on vacation with us because the house we booked does not allow pets. However, Justin's parents have agreed to dog-sit for us while we're gone, which works out perfectly. They have a BIG fenced in backyard and our dogs love it over there. It's going to be soooo difficult leaving our little Gogo for a whole week, but at least it will be a good socializing experience for her.
08-10-2012 12:42 PM
KCFilley
Quote:
Originally Posted by brw1982 View Post

I guess that's my long-winded way of saying...Thanks! I'll take 'em.
brw1982, in my book YOU will do a much better job any way of helping to educate and keep members. You have the knowledge, integrity and a heart to back it up. You also seem to have the wisdom to know when to be firm and when to say, hey, none of us are perfect. Hope that makes sense.
08-10-2012 12:37 PM
KCFilley I love the name Margot. How did you come up with it. She is perfectly adorable. That face surely will win lots of new toys and stuffies.

So is Margot going with you on vacation?

Each time I lost one of my boys, I was lucky enough to know they were nearing their journey's end. I had to have another to fill that void that I knew was coming.

Hugs to Margot.
08-10-2012 12:32 PM
MeadowCat
Quote:
Originally Posted by brw1982 View Post
If she didn't know any better, she didn't know any better. Me judging her and scolding her doesn't undo her buying from a BYB. But she's here now and she seems genuinely interested in understanding better breeding practices. That's far more than I can say for a LOT of noob's to the forum, or people I meet in general.

She's not being combative or defending her pup's breeder. She's a person who just had her heart broke by the loss of a great dog. I can empathize with that. I'm glad she found the forum and continues to seek information.

The desire to educate oneself tells me a lot about a person. There's a difference between that kind of individual and one that chooses to buy from a BYB, defends it in an abrasive manner, and then also chooses to insult show and working breeders at the same time while taking low blows at forum members.

If there's one thing I've learned in the last few years it's that I have a great appreciation for knowledgeable and experienced people who don't patronize others for not knowing what they do. I'm fortunate to know and have worked with some incredibly intelligent people who have accomplished great things in their field of work in their lifetime. And I am extremely humbled by the fact that they will talk openly to anyone and answer questions no matter how mundane and basic it may be to them. They recognize that while they are exceptional in their knowledge and expertise the rest of the world is not. They could be real @ssholes about it. But they're not. I have far greater respect for those individuals than others I've encountered in my education and work who are incredibly intelligent and experienced but are patronizing and treat others poorly for not easily knowing what they do. I'm by no means an expert on...well, anything LOL...but I'd rather be open with information I may have that others don't than be condescending to someone for not knowing exactly what I do and for not having the exact experiences I have. Knowledge should be easily found and shared. I firmly believe if the world, in general, were more educated we would not have but a fraction of the problems we currently do.

I guess that's my long-winded way of saying...Thanks! I'll take 'em.
Quoting this because I think everyone should read it again. Thanks for such a thoughtful post, Brigette.
08-10-2012 12:25 PM
Marieldobes
Quote:
Originally Posted by EmilyB View Post
Have fun, the new ones are all yours now.
So, the thing to do with the "new ones" who make the mistake and buy from a BYB is to beat em' up about it and drive them away so the next Dobe they get will come from a BYB, too! Pushing people to the point where they become defensive doesn't help - they leave - they don't learn anything. Educating without condemning them will go so much farther in steering them away from BYB's!

OP, I'm sorry for your loss of Lexie. Margot is a cutie! Please stick around! There's a lot to learn on DT and many knowledgeable people.

Jan
08-10-2012 09:03 AM
cbellphoto
Quote:
Originally Posted by brw1982 View Post
If she didn't know any better, she didn't know any better. Me judging her and scolding her doesn't undo her buying from a BYB. But she's here now and she seems genuinely interested in understanding better breeding practices. That's far more than I can say for a LOT of noob's to the forum, or people I meet in general.

She's not being combative or defending her pup's breeder. She's a person who just had her heart broke by the loss of a great dog. I can empathize with that. I'm glad she found the forum and continues to seek information.

The desire to educate oneself tells me a lot about a person. There's a difference between that kind of individual and one that chooses to buy from a BYB, defends it in an abrasive manner, and then also chooses to insult show and working breeders at the same time while taking low blows at forum members.

If there's one thing I've learned in the last few years it's that I have a great appreciation for knowledgeable and experienced people who don't patronize others for not knowing what they do. I'm fortunate to know and have worked with some incredibly intelligent people who have accomplished great things in their field of work in their lifetime. And I am extremely humbled by the fact that they will talk openly to anyone and answer questions no matter how mundane and basic it may be to them. They recognize that while they are exceptional in their knowledge and expertise the rest of the world is not. They could be real @ssholes about it. But they're not. I have far greater respect for those individuals than others I've encountered in my education and work who are incredibly intelligent and experienced but are patronizing and treat others poorly for not easily knowing what they do. I'm by no means an expert on...well, anything LOL...but I'd rather be open with information I may have that others don't than be condescending to someone for not knowing exactly what I do and for not having the exact experiences I have. Knowledge should be easily found and shared. I firmly believe if the world, in general, were more educated we would not have but a fraction of the problems we currently do.

I guess that's my long-winded way of saying...Thanks! I'll take 'em.
OMG...Yes!!!! THANK YOU! I could not have said this better myself. I just want you to know how much I appreciate you.
08-10-2012 08:55 AM
cbellphoto Originally posted by 4RosesTess:
After my first died, my hubby and I moped around for months, we finally looked at each other and said "Why are we not getting another one right away?" So we went out and got our second girl, she was from a BYB we did not know any better. But she was a healing soul and we loved her to bits. She healed our pain and brought us joy. Our third girl came from a show breeder because we learned. But I fully understand your pain and who desperate we get when we are missing the love of our lives. Good luck with your girl and enjoy her puppyhood as well as a long life.

Quote:
Originally Posted by EmilyB View Post
Thank gawd for those BYB's....can get you a pup right away.
And this would be a good example of yet another sarcastic, mean-spirited, judgmental comment, which makes these forums feel like we are all just treading in shark-infested waters.

Really, EmilyB? You REALLY thought that 4RosesTess was saying that it's okay to purchase a Dobe pup from a BYB if you want to get a pup "right away?" She clearly stated in her message that she did not know any better when she purchased her second pup, but later realized that she had made a poor decision by purchasing her from a BYB, and she LEARNED from her mistake. She also went on to say that she purchased her next Doberman puppy from a more reputable breeder as a result. She should have been commended for learning from her mistakes, but instead you chose to take a dig at her. Why?!? Because you think she should have known better in the first place? If you think back really hard, I'm sure you can probably remember a time when you didn't know so much about breeding practices, either, but you LEARNED, which is exactly what 4RosesTess is obviously doing.

I apologize for singling you out as a bad example, as there are unfortunately hundreds of other attacking comments made throughout this forum that I could have pointed out just as easily, but yours just happened to be the most recent one I saw. I just couldn't let it slide without asking if you REALLY felt your sarcastic comment was warranted, or did you just read "byb" in 4RosesTess' comment (and apparently nothing else) and your Pavlov's response was simply, "ATTACK!!!"? I'm just trying to understand why some members insist upon making this such an unpleasant experience for those of us who come here BECAUSE WE WANT TO LEARN. Don't scold us and put us down for not being born with the knowledge that you have already acquired through your own research and experience, HELP us.
08-10-2012 08:53 AM
madmony I love the black and white photo, she is adorable. I have been in your shoes and it is miserable. Our house was so empty and so were our hearts. She is a beautiful little girl. I can't wait for more pictures of her. A few years ago, we had not been without a dog for 25 years when our Lily left us. Two days later I was ready to go out of my mind. I was looking online at our local rescue and saw a girl listed, so off we went, but she had been adopted. Just then another dog was being brought back from her walk and we asked about her. We picked her up the next day. This has been a very emotional thread for me and I'm sure for you too. Please stick around, I for one would like to watch her grow and hear about her antics. Enjoy her.
08-10-2012 08:52 AM
dglvr
Quote:
Originally Posted by brw1982 View Post
I'd rather be open with information I may have that others don't than be condescending to someone for not knowing exactly what I do and for not having the exact experiences I have. Knowledge should be easily found and shared. I firmly believe if the world, in general, were more educated we would not have but a fraction of the problems we currently do.
Amen.
08-10-2012 08:38 AM
brw1982
Quote:
Originally Posted by EmilyB View Post
Have fun, the new ones are all yours now.
If she didn't know any better, she didn't know any better. Me judging her and scolding her doesn't undo her buying from a BYB. But she's here now and she seems genuinely interested in understanding better breeding practices. That's far more than I can say for a LOT of noob's to the forum, or people I meet in general.

She's not being combative or defending her pup's breeder. She's a person who just had her heart broke by the loss of a great dog. I can empathize with that. I'm glad she found the forum and continues to seek information.

The desire to educate oneself tells me a lot about a person. There's a difference between that kind of individual and one that chooses to buy from a BYB, defends it in an abrasive manner, and then also chooses to insult show and working breeders at the same time while taking low blows at forum members.

If there's one thing I've learned in the last few years it's that I have a great appreciation for knowledgeable and experienced people who don't patronize others for not knowing what they do. I'm fortunate to know and have worked with some incredibly intelligent people who have accomplished great things in their field of work in their lifetime. And I am extremely humbled by the fact that they will talk openly to anyone and answer questions no matter how mundane and basic it may be to them. They recognize that while they are exceptional in their knowledge and expertise the rest of the world is not. They could be real @ssholes about it. But they're not. I have far greater respect for those individuals than others I've encountered in my education and work who are incredibly intelligent and experienced but are patronizing and treat others poorly for not easily knowing what they do. I'm by no means an expert on...well, anything LOL...but I'd rather be open with information I may have that others don't than be condescending to someone for not knowing exactly what I do and for not having the exact experiences I have. Knowledge should be easily found and shared. I firmly believe if the world, in general, were more educated we would not have but a fraction of the problems we currently do.

I guess that's my long-winded way of saying...Thanks! I'll take 'em.
08-10-2012 08:17 AM
cbellphoto
Quote:
Originally Posted by 4RosesTess View Post
After my first died, my hubby and I moped around for months, we finally looked at each other and said "Why are we not getting another one right away?" So we went out and got our second girl, she was from a BYB we did not know any better. But she was a healing soul and we loved her to bits. She healed our pain and brought us joy. Our third girl came from a show breeder because we learned. But I fully understand your pain and who desperate we get when we are missing the love of our lives. Good luck with your girl and enjoy her puppyhood as well as a long life.
Wow, we have very similar stories! I'm so sorry for your loss, but I'm also very happy that not only did you find joy again in your second girl, but that you learned from your mistakes and made better decisions when you got your third Dobe girl. Thank you for sharing.
08-10-2012 08:11 AM
cbellphoto
Quote:
Originally Posted by devoted2dobes View Post
Margot is just beautiful! I followed your blog for Lexie every day and I can tell you the day I read of her passing I sat and cried in my car. It really hit home and I can't even imagine the pain you are experiencing. I am glad that you're Margot is helping to ease the wound. Our family looks forward to reading future posts about your little bundle of dobie joy.
This moved me to tears. Thank you so much for this reply. It means a lot to me knowing that you cared so much about my Lou, even though you never even met her. I'm also happy that you are planning to follow Margot's new blog. Again, thank you so much.
08-10-2012 12:47 AM
EmilyB
Quote:
Originally Posted by brw1982 View Post

I used to be judgmental and skeptical of individuals in similar situations to yours. You're not the only one still learning and evolving.
Have fun, the new ones are all yours now.
08-10-2012 12:46 AM
EmilyB Thank gawd for those BYB's....can get you a pup right away.
08-09-2012 11:56 PM
4RosesTess After my first died, my hubby and I moped around for months, we finally looked at each other and said "Why are we not getting another one right away?" So we went out and got our second girl, she was from a BYB we did not know any better. But she was a healing soul and we loved her to bits. She healed our pain and brought us joy. Our third girl came from a show breeder because we learned. But I fully understand your pain and who desperate we get when we are missing the love of our lives. Good luck with your girl and enjoy her puppyhood as well as a long life.
08-09-2012 10:22 PM
devoted2dobes Margot is just beautiful! I followed your blog for Lexie every day and I can tell you the day I read of her passing I sat and cried in my car. It really hit home and I can't even imagine the pain you are experiencing. I am glad that you're Margot is helping to ease the wound. Our family looks forward to reading future posts about your little bundle of dobie joy.
08-09-2012 09:56 PM
robinb Congrats!
08-09-2012 05:46 PM
Dictator Congratulations.

Margot is adorable as are her pictures.
08-09-2012 05:29 PM
leakaufman Very pretty little girl. I am sorry to hear about your recent loss.
Hope you stick around and let us see pics of her growing up. Best of Luck.
08-09-2012 05:09 PM
Beaumont67 cbellphoto - I have been called "rude" a rightfully "arrogant" before...LOL.
- but some bluntness above, makes me shake my head...given the heart wrenching story...you shared

PLEASE STAY HERE, much to learn...I knew the "odd snipes" would come out...but I never rained or peed on your parade..of puppy excitement.
- tough to make a most educated decision to agree with the hierachy...when your dealing with the death of a senior love dobe & your most vulnerable
I was hoping the reality of your purchase (not adoption, I know & you do now), would not be rubbed the wrong way.
Next time you will be armed with more & much info, but for now, you have a baby to raise with love forever.

My wife forwarded me this link, of a very old video...it is a classic (that many here can relate to):
- I am even old enough, to witness it live, on TV
Jimmy Stewart Reads a Poem About His Dog Beau on "The Tonight
Jimmy Stewart Reads a Poem About His Dog Beau on "The Tonight Show" - Johnny Carson - 1981 - YouTube

I am personally SORRY (given the circumstances):
That your new puppies happiness, has been shot down...but life is about learning, from others....so stay here.
- enjoy your fur-baby to the fullest, and post stories/photos of your pride & joy girl
08-09-2012 09:14 AM
brw1982 If I were in your position of just having lost the love of my life on 4-feet, I imagine it would feel pretty suffocating dealing with that loss let alone trying to think clearly about much anything else. And I imagine in that situation, if I didn't already know what I do already know, it would be difficult to sort through every fine detail of searching for a breeder. I know how much brain power my breeder search required 3 years ago and my life was going along just peachy at the time. It seems daunting, to say the least, to imagine if I were faced with that kind of search if it were just after having lost one of my current girls...the idea of even getting out of bed seems a bit extreme if I were to have just suffered the loss of one of them.

Anyway, I'm glad you've decided to stick around. I hope you continue to update us on Margot and ask any questions you may have.

I used to be judgmental and skeptical of individuals in similar situations to yours. You're not the only one still learning and evolving.
08-09-2012 08:38 AM
Capone's Mommy I am so sorry for your loss. This little girl sure is cute and hopefully she will help you heal a little better!!


Sent from my iPhone using PG Free
08-09-2012 08:28 AM
cbellphoto
Quote:
Originally Posted by Meldrew79 View Post
cbellphoto, Lexie's story was heartbreaking and I am happy that you found someone to help you through it. I hope that you'll do some research on breeders so when you're ready to add to your family again, you'll be a little more prepared on what's considered a reputable breeder. I've learned a lot from this site and hope you'll stick around to learn and share with us!

ETA: Margot's very cute...love her name!

I just wanted to thank you for being the perfect example of how it is possible for someone to get their point across tactfully and respectfully. I appreciate your condolences, as well. I have most definitely learned a lot from this experience, and I assure you that I will make better, more informed decisions if I ever decide to add another Doberman to our little family. Again, thank you very much much for your kind reply.
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