RIP Ruxin, I miss you - Doberman Forum : Doberman Breed Dog Forums

carrisa · 12-22-2012, 09:53 AM

I don't post often but I enjoy the reading threads and have gotten a lot of wonderful doberman advice here.

On Thursday night, I lost my big, handsome, love-of-my-life red boy Ruxin. I was inside the house and my husband was in and out getting the trash together to take to the curb. We had the gate open, and Rux went out into the street and was hit. The vet said he likely died in less than a minute from internal bleeding.

Rux always hung around close to us and didn't leave the property even when horses or other dogs passed by. If I had any inkling that something like this would happen, I would never, ever have left the gate open. But it did happen and now we've lost our boy because of our stupid, stupid mistake.

I hate that my beautiful dog was killed so violently, and at only three years old. Every time I hear a car pass by I think of the horror of the accident. I know I let Rux down and it is a burden I will always carry with me.

I am devastated to have lost him. He was so, so special. He was handsome and graceful- tall, lean, and leggy, and he was so sweet. He snuggled with me under the covers on cold winter days, and loved to push his head against me for an ear massage. I woke up hugging him every morning, and I loved coming home to him at night. He went everywhere with us- hiking, camping, our friends' houses, our parents' houses, shopping, sometimes even to work with me. He saw me through my wedding, law school, the bar exam, an out-of-state move and the purchase of our first home.

He loved riding in the car, and sat in the back seat quietly and politely, like a person, with his back legs on the perched on the seat and his front legs on the floor. He liked to sprawl over our bed, reaching out with his long legs to take up as much of the king size bed as he possibly could. When he wanted something, he would sit and gaze at me so regally that I usually couldn't ignore the request, and if I did try to ignore him he would primly tap my knee with his paw to just to remind me that he was still there. He loved dragging his jolly ball over the ground gripped in between his front legs, eventually working enough of a groove into the hard plastic that he could take the giant thing into his mouth and triumphantly prance around the yard with it. He had the happiest smile, and when I held my hands out he would sit on his haunches and put both of his paws in mine.

We loved each other so much, and I told him that every day. I really did love everything about him- his face, his big paws, his soft ears, the weight of his head on my lap. He was so beautiful, so smart, so loving, and just special. I am so heartbroken at the loss I can't do anything but cry.

I love you, my brown dog. I miss you so much I can't stand it. I'm sorry I let you down, and I mourn the years we will never get to spend together because of it. I'm sorry you had to die alone on the side of the road. I'm sorry I will never get to see your muzzle gray as you become a little old man. I'm sorry I can't hug you right now and breathe in the scent of your fur. I'm sorry I can't go outside with you to play, and I'm sorry there aren't doggie footprints in the snow that started falling after you passed.

I don't know how I will live without you, but I hope you are in a better place and happy and whole, and that someday I will see you again. I love you forever and ever.

**dobegal** · 12-22-2012, 10:12 AM

I am sorry for your loss. RIP Ruxin

RedDogRosa · 12-22-2012, 10:15 AM

Ruxin sounded like a super boy. This will get easier to do with time, but please try to remember him for all of the happiness he brought to your life, and try not to dwell on the way he passed. He would not want you to be carrying this burden. Think of how he lived his life with so much love and joy. You'll miss him, of course, but how lucky were you to have shared part of your life with him? RIP sweet red boy.

Fortheloveofadoberman · 12-22-2012, 10:27 AM

Hi Carrisa, what a very well written story of Ruxin. I really don't know what to say, it is so hard when tragedy like this happens, and happens all to often. It is quite clear that you loved him and feel so bad about what happend, but please don't be too hard on yourself. You won't forget him and he is no doubt up there looking down at you making sure all is ok, and, waiting, running happily at that bridge. I am so very sorry for you and your husband, especially during this time of the year. Hugs and Prayers to you. RIP Ruxin, run free sweet boy.

stryker2 · 12-22-2012, 02:02 PM

Sorry for your loss. RIP Ruxin. Someday he will be waiting at the bridge for you.

VZ-Doberman · 12-22-2012, 02:14 PM

Condolences.

eegreen · 12-22-2012, 03:12 PM

I'm so sorry for your loss. Run free Ruxin.

**dax0402** · 12-22-2012, 04:40 PM

So very, very sorry for your tragic loss. RIP and run free sweet Ruxin.

Maximo · 12-22-2012, 05:27 PM

So sorry to hear about Ruxin. My thoughts and prayers to out to you and your husband.

THE EULOGY

Look not where I was
For I am not there
My spirit is free
I am everywhere

In the air that you breathe
In the sounds that you hear
Don't cry for me Mom
My spirit is near

I'll watch for you
From the other side
I'll be the one running
New friends by my side

Smile at my memory
Remember in your heart
This isn't the end
It's a brand new start

By: Carol Kufner

dragonflyz · 12-22-2012, 05:37 PM

Sorry for your Loss!

Sherryh · 12-22-2012, 09:31 PM

I'm so sorry for your great loss...............Hugs from across the miles!!

Bluedobie · 12-22-2012, 09:38 PM

So, so sorry for your loss. Thanks for sharing your story and telling us about your wonderful sweet boy. Lots of hugs!

carrisa · 12-23-2012, 12:14 AM

Thank you all so much for your sweet words. It means so much to my husband and as we struggle through our grief. You are a wonderful group of people!

**Patches Mom** · 12-23-2012, 12:31 AM

Hug to you both so sorry for your great loss.

KissNme · 12-23-2012, 04:42 AM

I know you are heart broken. It's so sad. I'm very sorry for your loss. You did write a wonderful piece, a tribute, if you will to Ruxin. I agree with some of the others, please don't beat yourself up for this. Accidents and tragedy strikes no matter how careful we are sometimes. Whether it's our fur kids or a child, it's still a loss. That doesn't make the pain any easier to take. I wish you peace and comfort. I will say a pray for you and your husband.

Toby'shuman · 12-23-2012, 03:54 PM

I am so sorry for your loss.

Sleep softly in the arms of Angels dear Ruxin.

Kelsa · 12-23-2012, 04:51 PM

Very sorry for your loss, but thank you for sharing a well written tribute to Ruxin that celebrated his life and how loved he was by your family. My thoughts are with you and your family.

sandy2233 · 12-23-2012, 05:55 PM

Hugs to you. ((()))

Juicec6 · 12-23-2012, 06:13 PM

Prayers &sympathy on your loss.

PortersMama · 12-23-2012, 08:09 PM

Oh my.

This brought tears to my eyes. Your pain comes through loud and clear, carrisa...I don't think there is anything we can say to make it go away. I'm sure some of us can tell you that time will make it less raw and awful, but the future doesn't matter when the present hurts so terribly.

I'm so sorry to hear about your baby boy. He sounds like a really, really special pup. I believe that he knows you loved him very much. Hugs to you.