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Old 01-09-2013, 10:25 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Unhappy Puppysick and heartbroken : (

Found an incredible breeder, and it so happened that a black male became available after I had started talking with her. Went ahead and sent a deposit and bought a crate, nametags and collar for him. Just found out that the family that had originally put a deposit down for a black male (then changed their minds to Brown) changed their minds AGAIN and now I am heartbroken : ( I have been looking for a puppy from a reputable breeder within 4 hours of my home for 4 months and am getting pretty discouraged at this point.

Now this might seem crazy, but I don't have any kids of my own and this puppy was going to be our baby... and now I feel so dissappointed that he's not coming home. I'm at a loss.

The breeder was very kind and offered to send back my deposit or to hold it for her next litter. She has been so helpful in my search, and has spent hours on the phone with me talking about dobermans and giving me training advice... I would really love to have one of her puppies knowing the amount of expertise and support I would get, but at the same time my SO and I got so excited about this puppy that we're going to find it very difficult to wait months and months before her next litter.

Has anyone else gone through this heartbreak before, and what was your decision? Thanks!!
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Old 01-09-2013, 10:39 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Wow, that really seems unfair, of that family.

Sorry for the rollercoaster of puppy breath anticipation.

If I felt that strongly I'd found the right breeder, and liked the sire and dam of the next breeding, I'd personally wait--and get my dog fix by volunteering somewhere in the meantime.
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Old 01-09-2013, 10:49 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Part of me is hoping that the family will change their minds again... Just the fact that the breeder is being so accommodating to them says a lot to me about how much she supports her families. Maybe they have gotten puppies from her in the past and she has a good relationship with them, I just don't know. On the one hand she is being fair, they did put down a deposit first, and she never cashed my check. Just really, really hoping that I get him in the end... It's almost like a gut feeling telling me that it's going to work out, or maybe I'm just being overly optomistic! I mean, if they changed their minds twice, it can happen again, right?
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Old 01-09-2013, 11:10 PM   #4 (permalink)
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wow thats horrible and really crappy of the other family. Also, while I admire the breeders accommodating nature, there has to be a line drawn. This is not fair to those who have been patiently waiting. I agree, volunteer until the next litter. Sometimes, the wait can be worth it and I don't know if you believe in fate, but I'm a believer of everything happens for a reason and the old saying "good things come to those who wait" seems to come to mind I'm sorry this has happened.
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Old 01-10-2013, 12:20 AM   #5 (permalink)
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Why don't you take the red puppy?

Honestly, when I buy a puppy, there may be a color preference, but the color is not a deal breaker...well except for a dilute. But between red and black, I'll take whichever is available.
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Old 01-10-2013, 12:39 AM   #6 (permalink)
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Why don't you take the red puppy?

Honestly, when I buy a puppy, there may be a color preference, but the color is not a deal breaker...well except for a dilute. But between red and black, I'll take whichever is available.
^^^Good point. It didn't compute for me, that the other family's indecision might mean there'd be a red boy then available.

Gosh, I'd jump at that.

I'm biased, but...red boys will always be best, to me
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Old 01-10-2013, 01:14 AM   #7 (permalink)
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^^^Good point. It didn't compute for me, that the other family's indecision might mean there'd be a red boy then available.

Gosh, I'd jump at that.

I'm biased, but...red boys will always be best, to me
Yeah, red is always my first choice.

My first Doberman was a red and your first is a life changing experience. Seems like people always prefer the same color as their first.

ETA: When I went to get my first Doberman, there was only one red girl left...didn't even know they came in red...so if I wanted a Doberman for $50 she was it.LOL That was the best deal of my life!!! A long time ago...
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Old 01-10-2013, 02:05 AM   #8 (permalink)
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I would take a red in a second and I used to have black.
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Old 01-10-2013, 02:49 AM   #9 (permalink)
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Welcome to DT. Sorry you are going through such a turmoil. I, too, am wondering if FATE may be playing a part here. I understand your disappointment, though. I chose BLK/TAN, too, but I'm not saying I would never get a RED. Everyone seems to be so happy with their fur kids.
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Old 01-10-2013, 03:18 AM   #10 (permalink)
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When we were looking for a puppy we were hellbent on a black female, then we saw Bella and she was red and we just melted. The rest is history. I honestly don't think color matters, when you find the right pup you just know it. Go with your gut not with a color wheel. Good luck!
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Old 01-10-2013, 03:26 AM   #11 (permalink)
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My first dobe was black/tan he was a special boy....when he died I thought my heart would never heal. We got our red female and she has been the love of our life. So really color isn't that important when you're dealing with the love of the breed.....

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Old 01-10-2013, 06:25 AM   #12 (permalink)
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Sorry you are going through this. When I was getting my first Dobe in 2000, I was sure that I wanted a black/rust male. The breeder called me and said all they have left is a red female if I wanted her. I said no thanks, then decided to just look even though I knew I wouldn't want her. Once I saw her, my heart melted, and I quickly changed my mind. I had her for 12 years and she was the very best dog I have ever known in my life. She was my first Dobie. Sometimes I think things happen for a reason.
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Old 01-10-2013, 07:23 AM   #13 (permalink)
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I'm sorry about your rollercoaster. Welcome to DT.

I just have a question... why didn't the breeder pick the pup for you? Usually you can give them a preferred color/gender but in the end they pick the pup that is right for you. Although, I chose from my preference and a few others that would have fit my lifestyle anyway, I was set on one. I feel like the breeder picking which pup goes where is a lot easier for everyone involved. Just wondering.

Which breeder were/are you looking into?
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Old 01-10-2013, 08:09 AM   #14 (permalink)
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Wow that sucks. But I have to agree with everyone else, when I first started looking I was set on a black, then I happened across Rowan who met all the criteria I had in my mind except colour and as soon as I saw him he was mine and now reds are definitely my favs, but I'm already picturing a little black sister in a couple years


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Old 01-10-2013, 08:38 AM   #15 (permalink)
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This is a sign that the red boy is for you. Why wait.
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Old 01-10-2013, 12:40 PM   #16 (permalink)
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Old 01-10-2013, 12:53 PM   #17 (permalink)
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I'm sorry about your rollercoaster. Welcome to DT.

I just have a question... why didn't the breeder pick the pup for you? Usually you can give them a preferred color/gender but in the end they pick the pup that is right for you. Although, I chose from my preference and a few others that would have fit my lifestyle anyway, I was set on one. I feel like the breeder picking which pup goes where is a lot easier for everyone involved. Just wondering.

Which breeder were/are you looking into?
This is what I was thinking also. Occasionally I know a breeder might say ok blue and green are best suited for your family and you can pick between the two. Maybe it's a situation like that?

I personally pick by temperament more than color. I do have a color preference but if what I want next time is in a red package vs black, I'm still taking her home
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Old 01-10-2013, 01:50 PM   #18 (permalink)
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We also don't have kids and searched for ages for a litter before we managed to reserve a puppy. Even then I didn't want to get my hopes too high in the event something like what you had happened - I hear where you're coming from.

I gave my breeder a detailed description of our situation and facilities - old chihuahua bitch, old cat, school nearby with starter guns, fireworks, work schedules, what we want the dog for etc. She chose the puppy for us. I looked after Griffin's littermate for a few nights and the difference in temperament was obvious ( Griffin is not nearly as high-drive as his brother). His brother went to a house with 2 young dogs and a full house of people (lots of activity). Griffin has a perfect temperament for our situation. So I'm really glad we went though the wait and that the breeder chose for us - perhaps the temperament of the pup that became available wasn't so suitable but you can be sure you will get the right puppy for you if you wait for the next litter. Otherwise, tell the breeder you don't want to wait (I waited for 2 matings which didn't result in litters before finding another breeder) and ask if she can make a recommendation - the flight for the puppy is not that bad.
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Old 01-10-2013, 03:19 PM   #19 (permalink)
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I'm sorry about your rollercoaster. Welcome to DT.

I just have a question... why didn't the breeder pick the pup for you? Usually you can give them a preferred color/gender but in the end they pick the pup that is right for you. Although, I chose from my preference and a few others that would have fit my lifestyle anyway, I was set on one. I feel like the breeder picking which pup goes where is a lot easier for everyone involved. Just wondering.

Which breeder were/are you looking into?
I actually called her after the litter was already 3 weeks old. So in their defense, that family does get priority since their deposit was placed before the litter was even born. This was why, when we originally talked, she didn't have a black male at all. She still talked to me for two hours about what to do when I do finally find my boy, and I was so grateful to her! Then she emailed me the following week saying that family had changed their mind and the black one was available, so I talked with her some more and sent out a deposit the next day.
There were 3 black boys she was going to test and assign when they reached 8 weeks. Now there's a group of red boys that I can choose from, but my SO is really bent on black. He doesn't think we should "settle" if we're making this much of an investment in a puppy, that it should be exactly what we're looking for.
So for now, we are getting the deposit back, and are planning to wait for her next breeding unless we find another puppy between now and then : /

PS... The crate just came today, in the basement it goes, for now...


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Old 01-10-2013, 03:37 PM   #20 (permalink)
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Oh man that stinks. I gotta tell you though- I had a black boy and loved him, now I have a red boy and love him....I know he's not the color you were set on, but I bet you wouldn't think about that too much with that red boy curled up next to you
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Old 01-10-2013, 03:44 PM   #21 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by sullylas View Post
I actually called her after the litter was already 3 weeks old. So in their defense, that family does get priority since their deposit was placed before the litter was even born. This was why, when we originally talked, she didn't have a black male at all. She still talked to me for two hours about what to do when I do finally find my boy, and I was so grateful to her! Then she emailed me the following week saying that family had changed their mind and the black one was available, so I talked with her some more and sent out a deposit the next day.
There were 3 black boys she was going to test and assign when they reached 8 weeks. Now there's a group of red boys that I can choose from, but my SO is really bent on black. He doesn't think we should "settle" if we're making this much of an investment in a puppy, that it should be exactly what we're looking for.
So for now, we are getting the deposit back, and are planning to wait for her next breeding unless we find another puppy between now and then : /

PS... The crate just came today, in the basement it goes, for now...


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Couldn't you and SO just go visit with the puppies and then decide if it's still not what you want? I'm not sure how far you are from the breeder but after all you went thru I think it certainly warrants a visit just to be sure.

I also was hell bent on blk/tan and in fact that's what I got, but since getting my girl I have spent time with some reds who are just awesome and I think how silly I was to be so arbitrarily against them!

I mean, at the end of the day you want what you want and shouldn't settle. But how do you know a beautiful red boy isn't what you want if you haven't even seen him, right?
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Old 01-10-2013, 04:35 PM   #22 (permalink)
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I think what is really screwing you here is the color preference. What exactly would you be settling with? A different color? What happens if 1 or the 3 Red Males if not all have a better disposition and are a better match for you than the sole black male still available?

When we were looking for a puppy, I had a color preference of black as well, vs my wife who wanted a red, but after looking at a few and really figuring things out, we realize color was not important, which is why we went with none of the puppies we looked at, then came along a bad breeder trying to get rid of her last puppy for $200, so we called her up, told her if she needed it gone, then give it to us, she said come and look at her and she will think about it, so we did, and we came home with her, better yet for free, not supporting a BYB, but giving a puppy a good home.

My point out of all of this is, we were each set on a color, but yet, none of the puppies, regardless of color we looked at fit us, then with an open mind, we found Chloe, which ended up working into my wife's favor, BUT, we are both very pleased with her.
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Old 01-10-2013, 05:06 PM   #23 (permalink)
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We were originally "set" on a red boy, and I am hoping that we can eventually find the "whole package", a dog with the temperament and look that we want. This breeder is still 3 hours away, a little longer than I'd like to drive if we're just visiting puppies and not going to take one home. Plus, I think my SO knows I'd fall in love lol...
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Old 01-10-2013, 05:07 PM   #24 (permalink)
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Notice my avatar is a red boy ; )
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Old 01-10-2013, 05:16 PM   #25 (permalink)
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When I began Dobershopping, I leaned more toward a black than a red.

Ended up with a red. She definitely turns more heads than the tons and tons of blacks in our area
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