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Old 10-30-2012, 04:13 PM   #76 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by Matt Vandart View Post
I just read all of that thread it was great!
Apart from the bit with the stoopid trainer.
You have done fabulously well and so has Karl, he is loverly.
Do you still think he was outside his whole life before you had him?
I think he was.

Re-homeing dogs after you mend them is soooooooo difficult, I drove a 400 mile round trip to check out Bob the bull terriers potential new home before I let him go there and bent the ear of his prospective new humans even though I knew full well they had adopted and rescued EBT's before.
At the end of a 3 hour conversation I still found it hard come to a decision, even though I knew it was perfect for him, better than I could have given him. One gets very attached when mending very damaged dogs, purely because YOU can remember what they were like and it doesn't matter how much you tell the new people they just can't really visualise it.

Anyway thanks for documenting this so well I look forward to the next installment.
Thanks for your encouraging words. Most people who meet a rescue dog who is timid or skittish automatically think the dog was abused, but with Karl I really don't get that vibe from him. I mean, who knows really, but I do feel he was really just a street dog. It explains why he is so hypervigilant and how he was so immediately comforted being around other dogs. But that is just my best guess.

He is super attached to me, so it is going to be very hard saying goodbye. I have to have faith in the fact that when I find the right home, it will also be happy enough that it will still feel good.
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Old 10-30-2012, 04:14 PM   #77 (permalink)
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Dogs are a work in process it's like moving a ship slowly in port. Karl is blessed to have found you and your love and heart will work miracles. Hugs from across the miles!!
Thanks so much. I think he has touched my heart as much as I have touched his, so we are both winners here!
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Old 11-25-2012, 03:40 PM   #78 (permalink)
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So....I'm not going to count my chickens before they've hatched, but....Karl might be getting adopted!!

He has been going to the shows for a few months now and has gotten a lot of attention and a couple of apps even, which have fallen through. This weekend we were at a show and a family came in to see Karl and fell in love with him. We took him out to their house this morning to do a home check and meet/greet with their cat (we don't have cats, so I wasn't sure how that was gonna go!). And he did GREAT! He was a little nervous, but was curious and even relaxed enough to lay down for a while. He didn't seem to care too much about that cat, he did go up and sniff it but then left him alone. The family has 2 kids, but they are a little older and seem to have good dog-knowledge. Karl seems to like kids since they are less intimidating, but I wouldn't feel good about placing him with little bitties. The house was gorgeous and although it was not fully fenced, they have a nice yard that backs up to a golf course. The mom and dad both run and they have a 5 mile trail that goes through the quiet golf course community. We were very open and forthcoming about Karl's history and issues, and they did not seem scared off and they seem open to being patient and giving him time and space to bond and open up. He would only be home alone 3 days a week. Basically, all that's left to do is sign the paperwork.

It is bittersweet, and I am not going to let myself even think much about that yet, until all is said and done. Right now I am just trying to coordinate the paperwork and transaction of the "goods". Typically I would meet the adopters and an adoption coordinator at a Petsmart store and after they fill everything out and it is officially approved they could take the dog home with them right then. I think since Karl is so bonded to me he might really freak out and it could be difficult for them to even get him in the car. So, I think I am going to have them fill everything out and then I will make another trip out to drop him off myself (they live about 40 mins away).

I'm not sure what he is going to do when I leave. Pshh....I don't know what I am going to do when I leave!

Anyway, any advice or suggestions are welcome. I'm sure I will be back to update this thread in the next few days.
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Old 11-25-2012, 04:50 PM   #79 (permalink)
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He has been with you for so long..I understand the bittersweet feeling..but this is what it is ultimately all about. Please keep us posted. This is so touching.
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Old 11-25-2012, 07:50 PM   #80 (permalink)
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When you two guys are there, before you go in with the new family, explain it to him. Explain it to him the day before. And the morning of. And maybe even starting now.

And don't worry that he doesn't know English, just sort of picture him understanding it all, picture it all happening, and how this is a new, wonderful part of his life, and he will 'get' it.

He will. I don't know about tone or what, I just know animals do better when you explain it to them, maybe because it centers *us.*

When you leave him at his new home--if that comes to be, then do so with the same affection and nonchalance that you do when you leave the house for a couple hours, at your home
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Old 11-25-2012, 10:00 PM   #81 (permalink)
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When you two guys are there, before you go in with the new family, explain it to him. Explain it to him the day before. And the morning of. And maybe even starting now.

And don't worry that he doesn't know English, just sort of picture him understanding it all, picture it all happening, and how this is a new, wonderful part of his life, and he will 'get' it.

He will. I don't know about tone or what, I just know animals do better when you explain it to them, maybe because it centers *us.*

When you leave him at his new home--if that comes to be, then do so with the same affection and nonchalance that you do when you leave the house for a couple hours, at your home
This makes so much sense to me. My eyes started to well up reading it because I know exactly what you mean...and exactly how hard it is going to be, but also exactly how good and important it is going to be.

I had this really yucky feeling earlier today though, like a guilty feeling. I felt like a liar. Like I've lied to him all this time by acting like he is safe here with me when all along he was never intended to stay forever. I know that probably sounds crazy. Maybe I just need someone to remind me that he is a dog and he will move on and bond to his new family just like he bonded to me. I guess I just feel guilty because I feel like in a way I am abandoning him.

The fiancé told me "Don't worry, he won't even remember you after a few days". I'm not sure he meant THAT exactly, but I think I know what he was trying to say.
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Old 11-26-2012, 12:39 AM   #82 (permalink)
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Your thread is making me cry. It is so obvious how much you love him and how much he loves you.
I felt HORRIBLE giving Cher away to her new family and we only had her 6 weeks. She depended on me, she trusted me, she came to me for comfort. I was her safety. She tried to jump into my lap when they were ready to leave with her. I couldnt talk because i would have cried(and she was like the 10th foster dog). I am not a cryer, and haven't cried for any other adoption. Sometimes dogs just tug at you.

Karl obviously sees you as his safety as well. I totally get the guilty feeling... i SO felt that. You are a VERY GOOD foster mom, you have brought this little guy SO far. You deserve a big pat on the back. He will do well, just tell him he is a good boy and you will see him later when you leave...if you can talk. I might cry when you type he is in his new home lol.
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Old 11-26-2012, 12:48 AM   #83 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SpecialK View Post
This makes so much sense to me. My eyes started to well up reading it because I know exactly what you mean...and exactly how hard it is going to be, but also exactly how good and important it is going to be.

I had this really yucky feeling earlier today though, like a guilty feeling. I felt like a liar. Like I've lied to him all this time by acting like he is safe here with me when all along he was never intended to stay forever. I know that probably sounds crazy. Maybe I just need someone to remind me that he is a dog and he will move on and bond to his new family just like he bonded to me. I guess I just feel guilty because I feel like in a way I am abandoning him.

The fiancé told me "Don't worry, he won't even remember you after a few days". I'm not sure he meant THAT exactly, but I think I know what he was trying to say.
It helps me if I picture them as having traveled this really rough path, and in order to get up and across to a better road, they need a bridge.

I like being that bridge. That safe way across to the better life, to the real path they deserved all along.

He will never forget you or what you did for him. You prepared him to accept all the new love he will be getting.
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Old 11-26-2012, 07:07 AM   #84 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by thea2003 View Post
Your thread is making me cry. It is so obvious how much you love him and how much he loves you.
I felt HORRIBLE giving Cher away to her new family and we only had her 6 weeks. She depended on me, she trusted me, she came to me for comfort. I was her safety. She tried to jump into my lap when they were ready to leave with her. I couldnt talk because i would have cried(and she was like the 10th foster dog). I am not a cryer, and haven't cried for any other adoption. Sometimes dogs just tug at you.

Karl obviously sees you as his safety as well. I totally get the guilty feeling... i SO felt that. You are a VERY GOOD foster mom, you have brought this little guy SO far. You deserve a big pat on the back. He will do well, just tell him he is a good boy and you will see him later when you leave...if you can talk. I might cry when you type he is in his new home lol.
Thank you...I am not usually a cryer either, but this is definitely going to be a rough one. I really appreciate your kind words and understanding. He is (I think) our 10th foster too! But you're right...some just do it to ya!


Quote:
Originally Posted by RedFawnRising View Post
It helps me if I picture them as having traveled this really rough path, and in order to get up and across to a better road, they need a bridge.

I like being that bridge. That safe way across to the better life, to the real path they deserved all along.

He will never forget you or what you did for him. You prepared him to accept all the new love he will be getting.
Thank you. I told him last night that even though he probably couldn't even imagine it, there is an even better life out there for him. In my heart I know that. I know that this family can give him so much more than what I can and he deserves his own family. He's just going to take a little piece of my heart with him, that's all.
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Old 11-27-2012, 09:44 PM   #85 (permalink)
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I write this post through blurry eyes, as I just got back from taking Karl to his forever home. That was one of the hardest things I have had to do in a really long time.

They finalized the adoption paperwork this evening, and I drove him out myself to make it the least stressful for him as I could. I brought his food, a blanket from our house, a toy for him to keep and some yummy treats he likes to help them gain his trust. I talked with them for a little while and gave them all the tips and tricks I had and what to look for to know when he is stressed. Then we brought him into the back room so he would not be able to watch me leave. I told them to hang on to him because he might freak out when I left. I didn't make a big deal of it, then I just said goodbye, gave him a quick kiss on the nose and walked out. I couldn't look back, but I know he was trying to get to me. I just heard the little girl say, "but he wants her!" and the mom said, "I know, its ok". I walked out the door and to my car, bawled my eyes out all the way home.

The little girl gave me a card too, with my name decorated on the front and everything. I did not want to open it there because I knew I would cry, so after I left I looked at it, and the inside read: "Thank you for watching our dog until we found him". Inside was also a $25 gift card to Buffalo Wild Wings (which we had talked about briefly during the home visit). That made me cry even more.

I thought at one point I might have to pull over because I was crying so hard I thought my head was almost gonna pop off. So, I came home and squeezed Rowan so hard his head almost popped off!

I knew it was going to be hard, but knowing it unfortunately can't make the pain go away. I am going to have to muscle through the grief and wait for pictures and updates on his progress. I think the hard part is knowing that he is going to take a step (or more) back before he begins to trust his new family and bond to them like he did to me. Ultimately it will be the best thing for him, as they will have the time and resources to devote to him...I just wish I could fast forward to that part so the worrier in me could be at ease.

Thank you all who have helped me on this journey, it has had a big impact on me, bigger than I knew when it began. I am truly blessed to have been able to be Karl's person for a while, and I hope and pray that everything works out and his new people will be his forever people and give him the life he so deserves.
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Old 11-28-2012, 01:27 AM   #86 (permalink)
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<crying with you>

...off to pop off a few of my doggers' heads, too.
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Old 11-28-2012, 01:42 AM   #87 (permalink)
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I cant wait for the family updates. Thank you for helping this sweet boy! He has more people rooting for him than he knows!
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Old 11-28-2012, 07:37 AM   #88 (permalink)
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You did such an awesome thing for him. I hope we continue to receive updates as he settles in with his forever family (and he will!).
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Old 11-28-2012, 07:51 AM   #89 (permalink)
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Ugh...after crying and popping off my furkids heads I just wanted to say how very touching this story has been. You did a wonderful thing for Karl and it sounds like you hit the jackpot with this new family. He will take his time, but with their patience he will come around and will love them as he loved you. Those kids will grow up with him and he will be their dog and be a huge part of their lives. You've given him and this family a beautiful gift.

Cry your eyes out, eat some wings in his honor then pat yourself on the back for a job well done.
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Old 11-28-2012, 08:37 AM   #90 (permalink)
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You did the right thing. You gave him his very own family.
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Old 11-28-2012, 09:05 AM   #91 (permalink)
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Hard as it was, you did a wonderful thing for Karl, who lucked out when he found you. Best wishes, handsome guy, to you and to your new family.
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Old 11-28-2012, 12:13 PM   #92 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Hilary View Post
Ugh...after crying and popping off my furkids heads I just wanted to say how very touching this story has been. You did a wonderful thing for Karl and it sounds like you hit the jackpot with this new family. He will take his time, but with their patience he will come around and will love them as he loved you. Those kids will grow up with him and he will be their dog and be a huge part of their lives. You've given him and this family a beautiful gift.

Cry your eyes out, eat some wings in his honor then pat yourself on the back for a job well done.
Ooh, I knew I liked you for a good reason.

I really think to properly honor Karl and give him a proper send-off to his new fam, she needs to eat some real NY cheesecake, too, after the wings.
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Old 11-28-2012, 04:11 PM   #93 (permalink)
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<crying with you>

...off to pop off a few of my doggers' heads, too.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hilary View Post
Ugh...after crying and popping off my furkids heads I just wanted to say how very touching this story has been. You did a wonderful thing for Karl and it sounds like you hit the jackpot with this new family. He will take his time, but with their patience he will come around and will love them as he loved you. Those kids will grow up with him and he will be their dog and be a huge part of their lives. You've given him and this family a beautiful gift.

Cry your eyes out, eat some wings in his honor then pat yourself on the back for a job well done.
Ha ha thanks guys....I definitely got a good chuckle out of all the head popping! LOL
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Old 11-28-2012, 04:19 PM   #94 (permalink)
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I cant wait for the family updates. Thank you for helping this sweet boy! He has more people rooting for him than he knows!
Quote:
Originally Posted by MeadowCat View Post
You did such an awesome thing for him. I hope we continue to receive updates as he settles in with his forever family (and he will!).
Quote:
Originally Posted by VZ-Doberman View Post
You did the right thing. You gave him his very own family.
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Hard as it was, you did a wonderful thing for Karl, who lucked out when he found you. Best wishes, handsome guy, to you and to your new family.
And thank you all. It has been really hard on me, but it really helps to have the support of so many friends and "dog people" who have done a lot harder things than this, people who really understand how much heart goes into it. I guess you can't do a good job if you don't put in the heart, so there really is no easy way.

Anyway, I just wanted everyone to know how much I appreciate everyone's help all along the way. It really is inspiring and humbling to see how many people he has pulling for him.

I got a facebook friend request from Karl's new mom this morning. That eased my mind a lot, just knowing that another line of communication has been opened up. I sent her a little note just thanking her for reaching out and of course for the card. Also asking how his first night was and thanking them again for opening their hearts and home to my sweet guy.

She already wrote me back too! It was a little hard to read that he was of course upset when I left and has been sitting by the door a lot, looking like he is waiting for me to return. But already this morning he was going up to the mom and the kids, taking treats and went on a nice long walk at lunch.

I really hope I gave him a foundation to trust, so he can really bond with his new family and keep making more forward progress, so he can enjoy life to its fullest just being a dog.
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Old 11-28-2012, 05:48 PM   #95 (permalink)
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*tears* Stupid dogs making us love them. It is good to hear that he is trusting them though- YOU did that for him and you should be proud of yourself and him!
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Old 11-28-2012, 09:59 PM   #96 (permalink)
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*tears* Stupid dogs making us love them. It is good to hear that he is trusting them though- YOU did that for him and you should be proud of yourself and him!
Thank you.


Today was a lot better already.

Had class with Rowan, that's always fun...and our other foster is doing a nice job of peeing all over JUST enough to keep me busy and distracted. I think she is trying to help me...yeah, that's it!
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Old 12-24-2012, 12:32 PM   #97 (permalink)
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Hi SpecialK, I was just thinking about you and Karl after looking at your beautiful engagement pictures. I hope Karl has settled into his new home and is doing well.
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Old 12-24-2012, 02:33 PM   #98 (permalink)
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Hi SpecialK, I was just thinking about you and Karl after looking at your beautiful engagement pictures. I hope Karl has settled into his new home and is doing well.
Thanks so much for asking! I have been meaning to update this thread with a few pictures, but had to try to figure out how to edit first. Karl seems to be doing very well so far. He settled in and started warming up to his new family very quickly, which surprised me, but also made me very very relieved. That has made the transition so much easier on me, knowing that he is doing ok and that his new family has more time to give him.

Here are a few pics of him in his new home! [Please excuse the white blotches, I stole the pic from his new family's facebook page and didn't get their permission to post them.]

Enjoying some couch time with his new dad, brother and sister


And really starting to look comfy! Begging for attention, not letting his new mommy get much work done.


Matt had the great idea that we should send Karl a Christmas gift, but we never got around to it. I think we may still send one out late though...I would really like that.

I think someone said it right before, how we never stop seeing the dog we first met, but their new family sees a different dog...the dog they have become. That is so true here. I will always see Karl as the dog who was so scared he didn't even want to come out of his cage. But to this family he is just a little nervous and needing of that extra TLC. What a Merry Christmas!
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Old 12-24-2012, 02:41 PM   #99 (permalink)
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Karl is very lucky. First he had you and then a new loving forever family.
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Old 12-24-2012, 02:45 PM   #100 (permalink)
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Thanks so much for asking! I have been meaning to update this thread with a few pictures, but had to try to figure out how to edit first. Karl seems to be doing very well so far. He settled in and started warming up to his new family very quickly, which surprised me, but also made me very very relieved. That has made the transition so much easier on me, knowing that he is doing ok and that his new family has more time to give him.

Here are a few pics of him in his new home! [Please excuse the white blotches, I stole the pic from his new family's facebook page and didn't get their permission to post them.]

Enjoying some couch time with his new dad, brother and sister


And really starting to look comfy! Begging for attention, not letting his new mommy get much work done.


Matt had the great idea that we should send Karl a Christmas gift, but we never got around to it. I think we may still send one out late though...I would really like that.

I think someone said it right before, how we never stop seeing the dog we first met, but their new family sees a different dog...the dog they have become. That is so true here. I will always see Karl as the dog who was so scared he didn't even want to come out of his cage. But to this family he is just a little nervous and needing of that extra TLC. What a Merry Christmas!
This put a HUGE smile on my face.
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