Look, hospitals suck. They just do. The nurses are impatient, don't support natural childbirth and are just there to get you in and out. After the baby's born they whisk them away, clean them up, hand them to you for an hour or so then whisk them away again. I had to scream like a banshee to get them to bring me my baby back after she had been gone over an hour. My doctor literally walked in just to catch the baby, remark on how surprised he was that I actually did it (natural childbirth) and then was gone. Then there's the little heal prick tests they do which will make you and your baby cry. It's all uncomfortable and according to their schedule, shifts, desires, paperwork, etc.
But to me, it was a necessary evil. As much as my inner hippie would have loved a home birth, I am at least a 30 minute drive from the nearest hospital and really needed to know that if something didn't go as planned we would all have instant care and attention.
Have you ever watched the documentary "The Business of Being Born"? It was made a few years ago, and I happened across it on Netflix and I've probably watched it like 4 times now. It's all about how f'ed up the hospital system for birthing is here in the US, and how we have the highest C-section rate, infant and maternal mortality rates despite most women delivering in hospitals. They compare us to the rest of the world where midwives and home births are more common and they have better statistics than we do.
That documentary is what opened my eyes to the problem with hospitals and what prompted me to find a midwife. If I had it my way, and we lived closer to the hospital, I would opt for a home birth. But you never know when something could go wrong, and you don't have 30 minutes to make it to the hospital, or even wait for an ambulance. It wasn't a risk I was willing to take, even being completely low risk, so I still opted for the hospital delivery, but compromised by hiring the midwife (who acts as a doula in the hospital setting) to go through the process as naturally as possible.
There are other documentaries that I have watched on this subject. I think one was called "Birthing in America" or something along those lines, which had the same premise, but wasn't as well done as "The Business of Being Born". But while I was doing my research, I just couldn't get enough information. I'm a very research-y kind of person and I wanted to know what my options were. You should definitely check it out if you haven't already. Since you are so interested in this stuff, and have the same thoughts as me about it, I think you'd really like it.
No baby here, but grew up with the mantra that having a baby isn't a medical procedure, so it is refreshing to see people are still having babies naturally.
I agree! It's really sad that childbirth has stopped becoming a natural process of life and has morphed into an emergency medical condition.
You'd probably like that documentary, too - it discusses how the views of birthing has changed over the years, and how hospitals use it as a business now instead of being mother and baby friendly. They are certainly not there to give you an empowering, life-altering experience.
Its no wonder most women are scared to death to give birth - they watch all these horror stories on TV like (A Baby Story), and people screaming and being carted off for emergency C-sections. Most women just want their epidurals and drugs and just get it over with, and I feel that they are missing out on one of the most life-changing, empowering things they will ever experience. Its really sad.
I will pass along the one bit of advice that a very old friend gave me, back when we were about 19 years old - she was the first of my friends to have a baby, and I always remembered her philosophy about childbirth, and it absolutely helped me! She said that she thought of the process and sensations of labor and delivery as another aspect of lovemaking, and that she was able to "translate" the pains and sensations of contractions and delivery into sexual terms, which made them both bearable and joyful.
That's a really good piece of advice. I think it's all about how you interpret the pain. Remember that pain is just a sensation - its all in your head, honestly. I have a pretty high pain tolerance because of this way of thinking. So I'm hoping that will help me (and I'm able to remember that) when I'm in labor!
had a name to suggest but LOVE your idea of Liam James... L.J. ............
and had to laugh at your saying he will be ALL legs.
first thing i saw in your ultra sound pic was.....LEGS!
and you are truely GLOWING...........
Hugz to you and your long legged boy!
This kid will be on the basketball roster right away haha
I'm relatively new to the forum, so I'm not sure are you a first time Mom or not...if you are a first time Mom, welcome to Motherhood - the most amazing experience ever!!!
Thank you! Yes, this is my first child so its all a learning experience for me, but hubby and I are excited. Nervous, as all new parents-to-be probably are when they think about how their life will change forever, but excited all the same