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Old 10-18-2012, 11:45 AM   #276 (permalink)
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OMG I can't stand Carl, someone should just let him wander off to be walker bait
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Old 10-18-2012, 10:49 PM   #277 (permalink)
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Also, story of my life right now
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Old 10-18-2012, 11:30 PM   #278 (permalink)
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Old 10-18-2012, 11:57 PM   #279 (permalink)
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Old 10-21-2012, 12:08 AM   #280 (permalink)
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OMG I can't stand Carl, someone should just let him wander off to be walker bait
The writers might be starting to develop his character a bit.
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Old 10-27-2012, 06:30 PM   #281 (permalink)
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Ahhh yeah, that's a sweet itch...oo.....oooo. got it...lol

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Old 10-27-2012, 07:22 PM   #282 (permalink)
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The caption for this one is:

"I put my dog outside for standing on top of the living room table, and this is what he did":




A squirrel that got its head stuck in a Halloween decoration!!

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Old 10-28-2012, 03:04 PM   #283 (permalink)
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Funny Prayer about Getting Old at the Caregiver of the Year Dinner
Funny Prayer about Getting Old at the Caregiver of the Year Dinner - YouTube

This video, still brings me a smile:
One of the best inspirational videos ever - Susan Boyle - Britains Got Talent 2009
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VSrAJ...ture=endscreen
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Old 10-28-2012, 03:42 PM   #284 (permalink)
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HaHa-GREAT! Here's a Caption for your 2nd photo....



HOW A SQUIRREL APPEARS TO A DOBERMAN.....
Quote:
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AND....



HOW A SQUIRREL APPEARS TO A HOMEOWNER...




HOW A SQUIRREL APPEARS TO A HOUSECAT....




HOW A SQUIRREL APPEARS TO A HILLBILLY....
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A Toy? Shred & Destroy It.
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Old 10-28-2012, 05:30 PM   #285 (permalink)
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One of our friends, in the next room with my fiance, playing World of Warcraft: "I didn't mean to attack this beaver."
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Old 10-28-2012, 11:01 PM   #286 (permalink)
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The following Australian footage was introduced this morning "news". We were having breakfast and about to squirt Wait until 02:10.
Poor Koala, but I couldn't stop laughing!!!

Koala falls whilst being rescued from Australian mineshaft - YouTube
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Old 11-07-2012, 09:38 PM   #287 (permalink)
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The Red Green Show - Changing your Oil
The Red Green Show - Changing your Oil - YouTube
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Old 11-07-2012, 09:41 PM   #288 (permalink)
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Old 11-07-2012, 09:56 PM   #289 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Beaumont67 View Post
The Red Green Show - Changing your Oil
The Red Green Show - Changing your Oil - YouTube
I'll see your "Changing the oil", and raise you one "Changing a tire". Handyman Corner - Changing a Flat Tire - YouTube I've come close to using his method by the way. And for the same reason.
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Old 11-08-2012, 09:45 PM   #290 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Rosemary View Post
I'll see your "Changing the oil", and raise you one "Changing a tire". Handyman Corner - Changing a Flat Tire - YouTube I've come close to using his method by the way. And for the same reason.
Hi Rosemary
Red Green had some classic comedy...the duck tape guy...LOL.
On the 10th season, he got an idea from someone that wrote the show, asking for a skit that suggested "what if" the lodge ran out of duck tape.
- another funny one http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=naJ18PUo55o
And he always said, "if women don't find you handsome, they will find you handy"...always ended his shows, this way.
Yea, would be good on a road trip (headed to a dog show)...you with a flat tire, and me with a vehicle running on only an once of engine oil...

The Red Green nephew Harold, is my 2nd favorite character, on the show. The Red Green Show Ep 244 "The Moosetrap" (2002 Season) - YouTube
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Old 11-10-2012, 07:11 PM   #291 (permalink)
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Golf Vacation , 50 Shades of Grey:

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Four guys have been going on the same golfing trip for many years. This year, Dave's wife put her foot down and told him he isn't going, so he called his buddies to report the bad news.

Two days later, the other guys arrive at the golf course to begin their yearly golfing getaway. They are flabbergasted to find Dave sitting there in the clubroom with a foaming pint in front of him.

"How did you talk your missus into letting you go?"

"Well, yesterday evening, after my wife finished reading ’Fifty Shades of Grey,’ she pulled me into our bedroom. On the bed she had handcuffs and ropes! She told me to tie and cuff her to the bed, so I did. Then she said, ‘Do whatever you want.’ …

So here I am!”
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Old 11-10-2012, 07:15 PM   #292 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Beaumont67 View Post
Golf Vacation , 50 Shades of Grey:

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Four guys have been going on the same golfing trip for many years. This year, Dave's wife put her foot down and told him he isn't going, so he called his buddies to report the bad news.

Two days later, the other guys arrive at the golf course to begin their yearly golfing getaway. They are flabbergasted to find Dave sitting there in the clubroom with a foaming pint in front of him.

"How did you talk your missus into letting you go?"

"Well, yesterday evening, after my wife finished reading ’Fifty Shades of Grey,’ she pulled me into our bedroom. On the bed she had handcuffs and ropes! She told me to tie and cuff her to the bed, so I did. Then she said, ‘Do whatever you want.’ …

So here I am!”

Oh, 50 Shades of Grey....I laugh at it every time I'm at work. You see, it's still very popular (all 3 book sin the trilogy are), so every time a copy comes through my hands at the library, I open it at random and read a few lines (out loud, situation permitting)
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Old 11-11-2012, 12:42 AM   #293 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by GingerGunlock View Post
Oh, 50 Shades of Grey....I laugh at it every time I'm at work. You see, it's still very popular (all 3 book sin the trilogy are), so every time a copy comes through my hands at the library, I open it at random and read a few lines (out loud, situation permitting)
^^^^ GingerGunlock - don't laugh, & I learned something today...once I googled the definition......I will probably wait to watch, the movie.
-yea, if I could read free books, that one would, be hiding in my office desk...until finished, before it went back on the loan shelf

defined
- The erotic novel Fifty Shades of Grey has made grey ties a fashion must for men hoping to emulate the sexy entrepreneur who wears them in the book. The title also suggest the complexity of the man... hence 50 shades of grey. Since the human eye can only distinguish 32 shades of grey, the title implies that the main character is inscrutable, unable to be figured out......50 shades of grey is the title of a book by E. L. James. The novel is purely erotic and has attracted a huge female readership. The title relates to the submissive versus dominant relationship between the two main characters in the story. http://www.ask.com/answers/177418861...s-of-grey-mean

No cat or animal, was hurt, in the creation of this video chip...lol.
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Old 11-11-2012, 01:13 AM   #294 (permalink)
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Oh, I will emphasizes that we're not allowed to just sit around and read. But, a couple of sentences won't get anybody in trouble!
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Old 11-11-2012, 01:33 AM   #295 (permalink)
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^^^^He-he...I know.
I wouldn't have been cut out to work in a library though, as I even still ask my wife how to spell...

In grade1 I was in the english "rabbit category" and it wasn't the biggest complement...later my career studies would take me into the Eng. field.
- my SO was reading grade4 readers in grade1 (after only the first week) until sadely she got her fingers slapped by the teacher / that was the system, almost 5 decades ago, but she was always good, in languages
Have respected, those that have the reading & writing gift // I like short stories better, just adapted.
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Old 11-11-2012, 01:43 PM   #296 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by Beaumont67 View Post
^^^^He-he...I know.
I wouldn't have been cut out to work in a library though, as I even still ask my wife how to spell...

In grade1 I was in the english "rabbit category" and it wasn't the biggest complement...later my career studies would take me into the Eng. field.
- my SO was reading grade4 readers in grade1 (after only the first week) until sadely she got her fingers slapped by the teacher / that was the system, almost 5 decades ago, but she was always good, in languages
Have respected, those that have the reading & writing gift // I like short stories better, just adapted.
Audio books are pretty popular, too, and those come as books, short stories, and probably plays.



But yeah, what I laughed at today? We went to the park and Elka realized that "her" puddle was there. She SPRINTED for it and grunt danced in it, digging at the leaves and spinning, while I could only stand there and laugh.
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Old 11-13-2012, 02:13 AM   #297 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Beaumont67 View Post
Ahhh yeah, that's a sweet itch...oo.....oooo. got it...lol

so beautiful
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Old 11-14-2012, 06:49 PM   #298 (permalink)
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Never force children to pray!

At dinner, a little boy was ordered by his father to lead in prayer.
BOY: But I don’t know how to pray.
DAD: Just pray for your family members, friends and neighbors, the poor, etc...

BOY: “Dear Lord,”...he started:
Thank you for our visitors and their children, who finished all my cookies and ice cream.
Bless them so they won’t come again!
Forgive our neighbor’s son, who removed my sister’s clothes and wrestled with her on her bed yesterday.
This coming Christmas, please send clothes to all those poor naked ladies on my daddy’s blackberry mobile phone.
And provide shelter, Lord, to the homeless men who use mom’s room when daddy is at work.

AMEN
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Old 11-21-2012, 06:51 AM   #299 (permalink)
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Pet Owners - IQ Test
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Old 11-22-2012, 04:01 PM   #300 (permalink)
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GOLF JOKES

A husband and wife are on the 9th green when suddenly she collapses
from a heart attack!

"Help me dear," she groans to her husband.

The husband calls 911 on his cell phone, talks for a few minutes,
picks up his putter, and lines up his putt.

His wife raises her head off the green and stares at him.

"I'm dying here and you're putting?"

"Don't worry dear," says the husband calmly, "they found a doctor on
the second hole and he's coming to help you.

"Well, how long will it take for him to get here?" she asks feebly.

"No time at all," says her husband. "Everybody's already agreed to let
him play through."
___________________________

A gushy reporter told Phil Mickelson, "You are spectacular, your name
is synonymous with the game of golf. You really know your way around
the course.

What's your secret?"

Mickelson replied, "The holes are numbered."
___________________________

A young man and a priest are playing together. At a short par-3 the
priest asks, "What are you going to use on this hole, my son?"

The young man says, "An 8-iron, father. How about you?"
The priest says, "I'm going to hit a soft seven and pray."

The young man hits his 8-iron and puts the ball on the green.
The priest tops his 7-iron and dribbles the ball out a few yards.

The young man says, "I don't know about you, father, but in my church,
when we pray, we keep our head down."
___________________________

Police are called to an apartment and find a woman holding a bloody
5-iron standing over a lifeless man.
The detective asks, "Ma'am, is that your husband?"
"Yes" says the woman.
"Did you hit him with that golf club?"
"Yes, yes, I did." The woman begins to sob, drops the club, and puts
her hands on her face.
"How many times did you hit him?"
"I don't know -- put me down for a five."
___________________________

A golfer teed up his ball on the first tee, took a mighty swing and
hit his ball into a clump of trees. He found his ball and saw an
opening between 2 trees he thought he could hit through.

Taking out his 3-wood, he took a mighty swing. The ball hit a tree,
bounced back, hit him in the forehead and killed him.

As he approached the gates of Heaven, St. Peter asked, "Are you a good
golfer?"

The man replied: "Got here in two, didn't I?
___________________________

The bride was escorted down the aisle and when she reached the altar,
the groom was standing there with his golf bag and clubs at his side.

She said: "What are your golf clubs doing here?"

He looked her right in the eye and said, "This isn't going to take all
day, is it?"
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