Chelse

I am so sorry you have to go through this. I have no more advice to add but know that we are all here for you. *hugz and doberkisses*

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BenVera

OP, I've been wondering about you and how things are with Deacon. Please give an update when you're ready.

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Deacon's-MoM

We said goodbye to Deacon today. It is as painful as i could ever imagine... Really Really rough day. Deacon had a great day with us though - he woke up to steak and eggs, we spent the morning at the dog park with daisy and then we went to the vet.

Unfortunately, the sedative didn't work and he panicked went they put the tourniquet on and he had to be restrained - its really hard for us that it wasn't peaceful for him. We are beating ourselves up over hindsight that we should have asked for more sedative. But he is gone...

There are no words for how much i love him. The place he holds in my heart will always be his. One of the great gifts of my life was getting to be his "mom" and even though the last few years have been so hard with his diabetes and behavior issues it was the most wonderful ride. He taught me the meaning of love and responsibility and what that truly means, even when you cant a afford it or when it is heart wrenchingly hard you still HAVE to do it. He has been by my side through every single big moment of my adult life - i dont know how we got to be the people he loved but i will forever be grateful.

There will not be a day that goes by that you are not missed buddy. Rest in peace baby, no more shots - pain - or annoying toddlers. We love you...

forgive us.

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EmilyB

OMG, I am so sorry you had to go through that. I have never had a vet put on a tourniquet, perhaps that was specific to his condition?

Just know, he is glad you were there with him.

VZ-Doberman

Difficult decision but the wise one.

Hooligan

I am so very sorry Deacon's time with you has ended, and I can only imagine how agonizing it was to make the decision. My deepest sympathies. Rest in peace, Deacon.

HarvestMoon

I'm so very sorry.

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Dobejazz

I'm so sorry as a mother and dog owner I've also gone through this and feel your pain. Thank you for doing right by Deacon and being there for him at the end.

Run free of your demons Deacon happy and well at the bridge.

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Kelli
Toula, Pete, Bear Bear and Frosti

RIP Rogan 4-2008/3-2011

RedFawnRising

I will light the white candle for your handsome Deacon boy.

Thank you for doing right by him, what you said about doing it even when it was so hard--that really hit home for me--I have been there, too.

Healing energy to you--and Deacon would want you to know the only forgiving that needs doing is for you to forgive you.

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MeadowCat

I'm so very sorry. My thoughts are with you.

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Hilary

Shedding tears for you and your boy. I am so sorry. As a mom to both kids and dobe, my heart goes out to you for the difficult decision you had to make. It's so unfair. You made the right call, but oh how bitter it feels.

All my best to you and your family. RIP Deacon.

Toby'shuman

As I write I have tears in my eyes, I am so very sorry you had to make this decision it is never easy even when it is the right one.

Run free sweet Deacon.

May you sleep in the arms of Angels.

Shell81

I am so sorry I had to make this same decision about 3 yrs ago. I had taken in a mutt (border collie/husky) at 6 weeks (she had been dumped at our clinic). She was never right, no amount of socializing, puppy classes, vet checks etc could fix anything or find anything even remotely wrong. She started getting aggressive right around the time my daughter started walking, she bit my (now ex) husband more than once, and had always loved him the best. She lunged at me one day for absolutely no reason. Just sitting in the living room and all of a sudden she came at me. As a mom I knew I couldn't risk her around my kids, and I had to make that decision (she was 3 at this point). It still haunts me to this day, even though I know I made the right choice I feel like I failed her.

I worry about this with our new boy, I want our home to be his happy, forever home, and I am working hard to train him well, and with our kids but once something like this has happened to you it's always in the back of your head. I try to let it go, but it does worry me at times. I'm sorry for rambling, and I am so very sorry for your loss. Hugs

Fitzmar Dobermans

Hugs to you and your family You did the only thing you could responsibly do, so don't beat yourself up. I hope you remember the good times with him and know that he is at peace now.

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CH Cha-Rish A Moment Like This RN WAC CGC "Louise"
AKC GRCH/UKC CH Fitzmar's Command A Minute CGC "Harvard"
Fitzmar's Victory Hop Devil "Jezebel"

Brianne29

I am so sorry for your loss. As everyone else has said, I think that you made the very best decision for your boy, and your daughter as well. Your family is in my thoughts and prayers.

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GrdnDelite

I am so sorry you've had to do this difficult thing. I think we all often wish the right thing could, at least sometimes, be the easy thing. Alas, that does not seem to be the way of things.

I am also sorry you've had a traumatic experience with euthanasia. I can't tell you how much I had prayed my one difficult dog would not have to wear a muzzle to be euthanized, but, well, she did. Hurt me like all hell, but she was done here, really, regardless of her ongoing attempts to keep people from handling her in ways she did not like.

Regardless of the recent difficulties, you have years of precious memories with Deacon, and I know those will come to comfort you, over time.

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It should be good to be Dog.

Brianne29

And like GrdnDelite's post said, I've also been there. We had to euthanize our aggressive GSD, and although she was sedated, the sedation itself was traumatic, and I'm still not over that. It could've been worse, but she was snarling at the veterinarian and resisting restraint pretty heavily. The euthanasia itself was peaceful, but I know that her last conscious memory was of me crying and her struggling and some measure of pain. That is very difficult to live of, and I'm so sorry that you had to go through that.

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BenVera

I hope this snippet of my story doesn't appear dark, and it's not meant to be melancholy. It's just an opportunity to express my understanding and condolences to Deacon's Mom.

Levi's euthanasia didn't go that smooth either, and it left me with a sinking feeling in my gut that he somehow suffered through his last breath. It's a memory I cannot shake, and it still hurts.

The Vet came to our house to put him to sleep. He was clearly afraid of Levi and asked me to put him on a leash, but I refused. I'd given him a sedative earlier in the day to keep him relaxed before the Vet got there. They had been prescribed to him by his regular Vet previously.

Anyhow, he was definitely lethargic, but not sedate. The Vet injected his rear hock with a mixture (I can't recall) that contains the sedative and something that, instead of relaxing his muscles, made him very rigid and tense. He wouldn't lay his head down. He just kept looking at me like he was so confused and scared. It killed me.

I was trying to hold it together, but it was impossible. By the end of the whole thing, I was a wreck. You know that really messy sobbing where your eyes swell, nose runs, and somehow saliva finds its way out of your mouth and all over the front of your shirt... That kind of sobbing.

I can understand that must have made Levi feel very nervous about what was going on. I just kept talking to him through my sobs, and touching him.

After a few minutes, the Vet injected the second dose that took his life. I was furious that he didn't give me more time (or even a warning, for Christ's sake) to try to help Levi relax. It all happened so fast after that. His head relaxed and laid to the ground, and then he sucked in air with all his might like he was fighting to keep breathing, and then he was gone.

That final breath was the hardest of the whole experience. I'd never seen another animal do that before and was unsure if he had really passed or not. The Vet assured me he was gone. And then he and his assistant stuffed his body in a black trash bag and took him away to be cremated. He now resides in an urn in my bedroom.

I tried to make it the most peaceful experience for him, and I still don't think it really was. It certainly was the most painful experience for me. I can only hope he found some comfort and release at the end of it all. I haven't yet, but I hope I can let go of the guilt someday as well. We're always hardest on ourselves, right?

I'm so very sorry you had to go through the experience of putting your beloved Deacon to rest. Please take some comfort in knowing there are many of us out there who know how you feel and are grieving with you over his loss. You will be reunited with him someday. Until then, just honor his presence in your life while he was with you, and cherish what you learned from him.

Levi taught me to love my absolute hardest and to give of myself the most unwavering devotion to another living being. People may cross paths with many wonderful animals in their lifetimes, but there's always that one who "leads the pack", so to speak, and their memory lives inside you. Deacon is with you. Always.

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Burbank

I am so sorry for you, your family and Deacon, but you made the right decision

we put Whiskey down over a year ago due to illness and he to got the steak breakfast and loved every moment of it as I am sure Deacon did

It sucks and is hard, especially if "the time" is not a smooth as hoped, Whiskeys was not as smooth as I would have liked, and he was not nervous in vet offices but for that final shot he did resist, even though the will to live had left him and it still hurts some to think about it

Deacon's-MoM

Sorry for the late response but it took me a while to be able to come back to this thread. Thank you everyone for the kind words. Life has been a bit crazy as we try to adjust into the new normal without Deacon. The hardest part is my daughter wants to tell everyone we come in contact with that Deacon is in heaven. I know it is normal but her recognizing he isn’t home and voicing it so often is so very sad. Anyway, thank you all so much for sharing your stories. It does help hearing similar stories from people that I know loved their dogs dearly as well. I wish all of you a very Merry Christmas and a Happy Holidays!

Deacon's-MoM

Sorry for the late response but it took me a while to be able to come back to this thread. Thank you everyone for the kind words. Life has been a bit crazy as we try to adjust into the new normal without Deacon. The hardest part is my daughter wants to tell everyone we come in contact with that Deacon is in heaven. I know it is normal but her recognizing he isn’t home and voicing it so often is so very sad. Anyway, thank you all so much for sharing your stories. It does help hearing similar stories from people that I know loved their dogs dearly as well. I wish all of you a very Merry Christmas and a Happy Holidays!

CalamitysHuckleberry

Because I am new to this forum, I just saw this thread and it broke my heart.

I am a severe insulin dependent diabetic with HUGE fluctuations in my blood sugars. I am a pure jerk when high or low. Actually it's one of the first signs that I need to check my levels. Most of the time I can catch it, but sometimes and especially in the past many have suffered from my verbal lashings. I was a paramedic for many years and I have been hit and beaten more than once by a hypoglycemic patient.

I could only imagine if you add in the characteristics that come with not only being a dog but a Doberman. Not to mention when you have something walking past you at eye level. Finally, lets not forget what diabetes does to the eyesight. Damage I could tell you about but Deacon couldn't, nor could he understand what it was doing to him.

I have had diabetes less than two years and there isn't a day that goes by that I don't feel like crap. The neuropathy is unimaginable but I get to take medicine and other measures for it and it helps, Deacon and other animals with diabetes doesn't get that. As bad as this may sound; if I didn't have the support care, equipment, other medicines...if all I had (because that's all they have to offer for diabetic animals) was insulin twice a day, then I think I would want to be put out of my misery also and I know I would be a bear to be around. Unfortunately he only knew one way to react.

Y'all did the right thing!

One more thing about the euthanasia.

My wonderful Mother spent five miserable days in the hospital dying. Due to family issues and negligent hospital staff, my Mother suffered like no other living thing should ever suffer.

My Mother also so lovingly stated in her will that I were to get her dogs, woo hoo I got two Shelties, one that was about 12 years old, which I had given to my Mother as a puppy for Mothers Day and other that was 8 years old.

These Shelties fit in real well with the three dogs we already had at home, NOT. When it was all said we had her 12 y/o Sheltie-Sheba with a bladder tumor, 8 y/o Sheltie-Lucky with liver issues, two Cockers (one senile running into walls, other with mouth cancer) a rescue dobie with wobblers and 11 years old. We were more than pleased.

Needless to say we put 4 dogs down in a year (we still have Lucky, he is very contrary though), but Sheba hurt a little different, she went so peacefully - no struggling to breath for 5 days, or kicking the legs, or gurgling, or moaning in pain. She laid her head down on my lap and went to sleep. All I could think of was the irony in this.

I've added a picture of her sleeping, she was a sweet sleeper and a sweet girl.

Thanks for sharing your struggle, it allowed me to share mine.

You are in my thoughts.



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