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Old 03-27-2012, 12:16 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Your dogs relationship with you and family members.

I'm curious as to the relationships everyone's dogs has to them and the rest of the family. I feel like Diesel has a better bond with his dad (my boyfriend) more then with me. I'm not sure if it's because he's with him a lot more because I work more or what it is. I know Diesel loves me but sometimes I feel like he'd rather be with my boyfriend then me which makes me sad. Except when it comes to cuddling then he comes to me. Lame I know haha I was just wondering how everyone else feels with their dogs and other people in the family and if all of this is a good or bad thing and should I be doing something differently.

I forgot to mention when it's just one of us with him and not both he is great and I don't feel this way but when we're together it's different.
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Old 03-27-2012, 12:24 PM   #2 (permalink)
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It's not something I worry about. As long as everyone in the house is happy, I'm happy. I feed, do all the training, socializing, etc. so I think they might be more bonded to me but it isn't something horribly obvious. When they don't feel good they tend to come to me, but that might be because typically I do most of the care, etc. too. That being said, Flirt loves her Dad and she MUST get cuddle time with him (and me) every night. Even if she has to squeeze into the tiniest of spots..she finds a way to cuddle.
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Old 03-27-2012, 12:28 PM   #3 (permalink)
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It's not something I worry about. As long as everyone in the house is happy, I'm happy. I feed, do all the training, socializing, etc. so I think they might be more bonded to me but it isn't something horribly obvious. When they don't feel good they tend to come to me, but that might be because typically I do most of the care, etc. too. That being said, Flirt loves her Dad and she MUST get cuddle time with him (and me) every night. Even if she has to squeeze into the tiniest of spots..she finds a way to cuddle.
Oh I completely agree as long as everyone is happy I'm happy. I was just curious if it was a normal thing for them to bond differently with people in the same house. I do the training and the socializing and the spoiling haha but dad does the two early feedings (I do the night) and does a lot of the playing since he has him all day. I take Diesel for a one on one walk when I get home so we get some time together. He just seems to go to dad for more things then me but I do enjoy my cuddle time
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Old 03-27-2012, 12:32 PM   #4 (permalink)
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The experts should weigh in on this one, because I've wondered too if Dobies are generally one-man dogs?
Our girl seems to have a different relationship with every person in the family, but loves us equally and seeks different family members out for different reasons.
Based on my experience, I would say that their hearts are big enough for all!
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Old 03-27-2012, 12:38 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by dobedream View Post
The experts should weigh in on this one, because I've wondered too if Dobies are generally one-man dogs?
Our girl seems to have a different relationship with every person in the family, but loves us equally and seeks different family members out for different reasons.
Based on my experience, I would say that their hearts are big enough for all!
No doubt they have a lot of love my fear is that Diesel will start to listen to dad better then me and let's say something happened while he was with me I would want to know he would listen to me and wouldn't leave me.
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Old 03-27-2012, 12:47 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Juno loves anyone who comes in the house.. But she respects me more? She will NOT jump or paw me, and listens when I tell her to do something, more so than anyone in the house. But she does listen fairly well to anyone giving her a command.. If that makes sense.
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Old 03-27-2012, 01:14 PM   #7 (permalink)
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We have four in our canine family and the relationships between all of us are interesting.

Harry (the ancient GSD) is mine... all mine. Hubby loves him too, but he was MY pick from the litter, I was the one who sat up all night with him when he was poorly as a pup, and I always spent a lot of one-on-one time with him. He bonded with me in a way he really didn't with hubby. (Hubby's dog was Harry's brother, Bob, who we lost a year ago.) I have a special love for old dogs, whereas hubby sometimes gets a bit impatient with him.

Rubin, our rescue Rottie x Dobe, is incredibly strongly bonded to both of us but in different ways. My husband says that where Rubin is concerned, the whole owner/master v dog concept is irrelevant: He and Rubin are essentially "brothers"! The two of them love to rough and tumble together and I think Ru sees my husband as his chief playmate. When we first brought him home, there were some over-exhuberance issues, and some mouthing/play-biting stuff that we had to work on, and I think it was really important that my husband was there as a strong, physical, male presence to teach Rubin the boundaries. I'm not sure I could have handled him alone. But Rubin completely adores me... he is the most demonstratively loving dog I've ever known. He is gentle with me... it's like he knows that there is "boy stuff" he can do with his dad, but he doesn't even try rough-housing with me. Sometime we just find it hard to comprehend how we can have bonded so utterly with a dog we didn't raise from a pup... but he's our wonderful, special boy... in 20+ years of dog ownership he's the only dog we've ever let sleep on the bed with us!

The two girls, Lily and Maya (also Rottie x Dobes) ... well, here's where it gets strange. They are now 9 months old. Lily was the pup I picked, and Maya was my husband's pick. That's how we planned it: Lily was "mine" and Maya was "his". But somehow, once we got them home and embedded in the family, Lily "chose" my husband, and Maya "chose" me! They swapped! Lily is the more extrovert personality and seemed to gravitate to my husband, who is also more extrovert. Maya is quieter, gentler and more introverted - more like me, I guess! Lily will cuddle up with my husband, whereas Maya follows me around and always wants to be close to me.

My husband works from home whereas I don't, so he is physically with them for more time during the day. But we walk them together, feed them together and cuddle up on the sofa in the evening all together, so essentially, we all belong to each other, in one big human-canine lovefest.
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Old 03-27-2012, 01:40 PM   #8 (permalink)
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They're both very family orientated, but they each have their favourite person. Ripley is mine and Keira is my mom's. Though Keira and I are becoming much closer. I'm pretty sure she'll always prefer my mom though, for whatever reason. I've always done more for all of the dogs than she does, but I guess dogs just choose their favourites regardless sometimes. My brother doesn't mean much to any of my dogs. He's just there. He doesn't do anything with them, doesn't feed them, hardly pets them, etc. They like him, but they seem to understand he's not really a dog person (he likes dogs but doesn't like the responsibility of caring for them) the same way my mom and I are.

Dance is also my dog. She's my shadow and follows me everywhere. My mom says that often when I am not home (at work) and she is home, Dance will spend part of the day sleeping in the basement by herself waiting for me to come home or sleeping by the door waiting. She loves my mom too, but I am her world. When I'm home she never leaves for any alone time.

I think most of my dogs, regardless of breed, have all had a favourite person. Dobermans are known as "one person" dogs, but I think a lot of other dogs also are. That's been my experience anyway.

ETA: Eventhough Keira prefers my mom over myself, she is a complete and total brat for my mom. She respects me much more. All of the dogs do. And we have no idea why. My mom and I expect the same things and act pretty similarly toward the dogs, but I must carry myself differently with them or something. The Dobermans especially are total idiots with her a lot of the time. And with me, they're totally different (much calmer) dogs.
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Old 03-27-2012, 01:47 PM   #9 (permalink)
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I train Odin, walk and feed him but Odin still craves my boyfriends attention. Don't put yourself lower in rank, try to see you and your boyfriend as equally ranked in The pack and diesel after you two. there is a possibility desiel see's your boyfriend pack leader, him next then you. You and your boyfriend should both be pack leader.

Even though my boyfriend doesn't do anything with Odin, I mean nothing my boyfriend still puts himself higher than Odin and I think Odin respects that. It's funny seeing Odin try to Get his attention. Whenever my bf is standing in The living room with me Odin will Get up and go lay Down on his feet.
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Old 03-27-2012, 01:56 PM   #10 (permalink)
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Delta listens to me better, probably because I did all her initial training and still do more training-type activities with her now.

My husband, however, is her bestest buddy in the whole world and will get down on the floor or the grass and wrestle with her.
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Old 03-27-2012, 02:03 PM   #11 (permalink)
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Thanks everyone. These are great stories. I guess I'm just jealous he seems to like my boyfriend better where as my lab loves me and would do anything for me. I'm like chopped liver to Diesel some nights.
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Old 03-27-2012, 02:07 PM   #12 (permalink)
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I think they are most definitely one person dogs, but really aren't most?

I must be a dobes favorite person because all three of the dobes I have had are/were devoted to me. (all females)

My GSD likes me a lot, but he's definitely my husband's dog.
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Old 03-27-2012, 02:08 PM   #13 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Fengirl View Post
We have four in our canine family and the relationships between all of us are interesting.

Harry (the ancient GSD) is mine... all mine. Hubby loves him too, but he was MY pick from the litter, I was the one who sat up all night with him when he was poorly as a pup, and I always spent a lot of one-on-one time with him. He bonded with me in a way he really didn't with hubby. (Hubby's dog was Harry's brother, Bob, who we lost a year ago.) I have a special love for old dogs, whereas hubby sometimes gets a bit impatient with him.

Rubin, our rescue Rottie x Dobe, is incredibly strongly bonded to both of us but in different ways. My husband says that where Rubin is concerned, the whole owner/master v dog concept is irrelevant: He and Rubin are essentially "brothers"! The two of them love to rough and tumble together and I think Ru sees my husband as his chief playmate. When we first brought him home, there were some over-exhuberance issues, and some mouthing/play-biting stuff that we had to work on, and I think it was really important that my husband was there as a strong, physical, male presence to teach Rubin the boundaries. I'm not sure I could have handled him alone. But Rubin completely adores me... he is the most demonstratively loving dog I've ever known. He is gentle with me... it's like he knows that there is "boy stuff" he can do with his dad, but he doesn't even try rough-housing with me. Sometime we just find it hard to comprehend how we can have bonded so utterly with a dog we didn't raise from a pup... but he's our wonderful, special boy... in 20+ years of dog ownership he's the only dog we've ever let sleep on the bed with us!

The two girls, Lily and Maya (also Rottie x Dobes) ... well, here's where it gets strange. They are now 9 months old. Lily was the pup I picked, and Maya was my husband's pick. That's how we planned it: Lily was "mine" and Maya was "his". But somehow, once we got them home and embedded in the family, Lily "chose" my husband, and Maya "chose" me! They swapped! Lily is the more extrovert personality and seemed to gravitate to my husband, who is also more extrovert. Maya is quieter, gentler and more introverted - more like me, I guess! Lily will cuddle up with my husband, whereas Maya follows me around and always wants to be close to me.

My husband works from home whereas I don't, so he is physically with them for more time during the day. But we walk them together, feed them together and cuddle up on the sofa in the evening all together, so essentially, we all belong to each other, in one big human-canine lovefest.
I love that part haha

I loved the story about how your pups switched you two haha thank you for your stories
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Old 03-27-2012, 02:09 PM   #14 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by EmilyB View Post
I think they are most definitely one person dogs, but really aren't most?

I must be a dobes favorite person because all three of the dobes I have had are/were devoted to me. (all females)

My GSD likes me a lot, but he's definitely my husband's dog.
That just means I need another one to bond with me haha jk not right now.
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Old 03-27-2012, 02:26 PM   #15 (permalink)
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Dylan has different relationships to each of us in the house. I'm the one who does the training, but Dave (my husband) feeds in the morning, and I feed in the evening. We do potty walks pretty equally (but somehow I always end up with poop-scooping duty).

Dylan is very respectful to me, most likely because I do the training, grooming, dremeling, teeth brushing, etc.. But he's super respectful of Dave, even though he does none of that. Perhaps he perceives him as the boss. But Dave is also the one who will most often climb down on the floor and do all the lovin' and rubbin'.



With my older son, he's cautiously optimistic. Andrew isn't super interested in Dylan, but every now and then will pet him and play with him. Oddly enough, Andrew shows the most interest in learning how to "train" Dylan. They're friends, but not BFF's.



Jason, my middle son, is by and far, Dylan's BFF. They're like brothers in a different skin. Crazy together, Dylan is much less inhibited (and so is Jason, so I have to watch them like a hawk), and Dylan won't hesitate to solicit attention from Jason when he can find it nowhere else. And Jason is usually up for it. He calls Dylan "my pal" and has dubbed him "Silly Dilly."



Dylan has recently appointed himself my baby's official personal security officer, and can almost always be found stationed nearby, keeping watch. He is extremely gentle with Nathan, and will tolerate ear pulling, teeth exploration, and being hammered by the walker, just to be near him. He knows his boundaries, and respects them, but he has a tremendous love for this baby. Perhaps it's because the older two boys are at preschool in the mornings. Perhaps it's because there's just something special between the two of them. Whatever it is, it's beautiful to see. Dylan is such a gentle soul, as I believe all dobermans are.

(It was hard to choose just one photo for this one)
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Old 03-27-2012, 02:30 PM   #16 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by DoubleDogDare View Post
Dylan has different relationships to each of us in the house. I'm the one who does the training, but Dave (my husband) feeds in the morning, and I feed in the evening. We do potty walks pretty equally (but somehow I always end up with poop-scooping duty).

Dylan is very respectful to me, most likely because I do the training, grooming, dremeling, teeth brushing, etc.. But he's super respectful of Dave, even though he does none of that. Perhaps he perceives him as the boss. But Dave is also the one who will most often climb down on the floor and do all the lovin' and rubbin'.



With my older son, he's cautiously optimistic. Andrew isn't super interested in Dylan, but every now and then will pet him and play with him. Oddly enough, Andrew shows the most interest in learning how to "train" Dylan. They're friends, but not BFF's.



Jason, my middle son, is by and far, Dylan's BFF. They're like brothers in a different skin. Crazy together, Dylan is much less inhibited (and so is Jason, so I have to watch them like a hawk), and Dylan won't hesitate to solicit attention from Jason when he can find it nowhere else. And Jason is usually up for it. He calls Dylan "my pal" and has dubbed him "Silly Dilly."



Dylan has recently appointed himself my baby's official personal security officer, and can almost always be found stationed nearby, keeping watch. He is extremely gentle with Nathan, and will tolerate ear pulling, teeth exploration, and being hammered by the walker, just to be near him. He knows his boundaries, and respects them, but he has a tremendous love for this baby. Perhaps it's because the older two boys are at preschool in the mornings. Perhaps it's because there's just something special between the two of them. Whatever it is, it's beautiful to see. Dylan is such a gentle soul, as I believe all dobermans are.

(It was hard to choose just one photo for this one)
First off, what a beautiful family and dog. Secondly thank you for sharing. He really does have a lot of different rolls in your family and it's great to see him get along so well with your kids. This is how I'd love for diesel to be, very diverse and has different love and respect for me and my boyfriend. oh and don't worry I'm always in poop scooping duty too haha
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Old 03-27-2012, 02:35 PM   #17 (permalink)
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I would say Toby is bonded more to me than my husband or son. This I believe is because I do everything for him, feed, walk, socialise, play, cuddle, train, nurse.
My 2 Terriers are a little more gregarious so whilst I do the same things with them as I do with Toby they are bonded with my husband and son as well.
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Old 03-27-2012, 02:36 PM   #18 (permalink)
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Dylan had never really had much interaction with kids before he was six months old or so, and then we got him at seven months. I think he's just got the temperament we were looking for, and our breeder did a great job pairing us up with the right dog. By time we got Dylan home from the breeder, he was already bonded to my kids. He goes with us for preschool drop off and pick up, and goes to the park with us. He also LOVES when my kids have other kids over for playdates. In his mind, the more kids the better! He's always been extremely gentle and self-controlled with kids. With new adults, however, I have to be constantly on him to stop jumping around and getting in their faces. He gets very excited. But he just seems to know to be more gentle with children.
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Old 03-27-2012, 02:39 PM   #19 (permalink)
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Quote:
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Dylan had never really had much interaction with kids before he was six months old or so, and then we got him at seven months. I think he's just got the temperament we were looking for, and our breeder did a great job pairing us up with the right dog. By time we got Dylan home from the breeder, he was already bonded to my kids. He goes with us for preschool drop off and pick up, and goes to the park with us. He also LOVES when my kids have other kids over for playdates. In his mind, the more kids the better! He's always been extremely gentle and self-controlled with kids. With new adults, however, I have to be constantly on him to stop jumping around and getting in their faces. He gets very excited. But he just seems to know to be more gentle with children.
That's amazing and is great for people see a Doberman like that. They really are just big love bugs. Diesel wasn't sure of kids at first but now he loves them he just has to learn how to be gentle with them and not jump like he wants to. It's even better that Dylan was older when you got him and learned to be gentle with kids. What a great dog.
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Old 03-27-2012, 02:40 PM   #20 (permalink)
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All of my girls have been mine. I do all of the training, feeding, grooming and special bonding time. They listen to me without hestation. My husband they still listen just not as quick. Now Roxy the latest girl does something with my husband that she never does with me. When my husband is sitting in a chair she will walk up to him and places her head in the nook of his neck. Go figure. That is their special time.
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Old 03-27-2012, 03:16 PM   #21 (permalink)
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I met my boyfriend before I got Dreizehn but I had been planning on Dreizehn for years. Before my boyfriend and I officially started dating I told him (quite bluntly) that I was getting a dog, that I had wanted a dog all of my life, and if we were to date not only would the dog come first but if the dog started to like him more than he was gone.

Needless to say, Dreizehn is my dog first and foremost. He loves my boyfriend, Dustin, but mostly just views him as a playmate. He listen's to Dustin, but not as quickly as he listens to me. Dreizehn could care less where Dustin is and what he's doing but if I make the slightest move he's either watching and/or following me. Dreizehn is also more likely to stand between me and someone creepy than he is with Dustin. I worked really hard to get things this way, however. I'm the only one who feeds him, the only one who trains him, the only one who brushes him, the only one who takes him for walks, and generally the only one who crates and uncrates him.
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Old 03-27-2012, 03:18 PM   #22 (permalink)
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With Ilka, let's put it this way: Mommy feeds me, trains me, walks me, plays with me, grooms me, and cleans up after me, but DADDY give better tummy scritches. Lucky, well, he likes anyone who takes him for a walk.
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Old 03-27-2012, 03:39 PM   #23 (permalink)
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He actually listens to her.
I'm his play buddy. And tickets to walks. And sneaky snacks.
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Old 03-27-2012, 03:47 PM   #24 (permalink)
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I'm like chopped liver to Diesel some nights.
Wow, you rate up there with chopped liver?!! That's like super-high in the canine rating system, right? I'm not sure I'd outrank 'dead squirrel' and I thought I was doing pretty good! ;p
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Old 03-27-2012, 03:52 PM   #25 (permalink)
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Quote:
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I met my boyfriend before I got Dreizehn but I had been planning on Dreizehn for years. Before my boyfriend and I officially started dating I told him (quite bluntly) that I was getting a dog, that I had wanted a dog all of my life, and if we were to date not only would the dog come first but if the dog started to like him more than he was gone.

Needless to say, Dreizehn is my dog first and foremost. He loves my boyfriend, Dustin, but mostly just views him as a playmate. He listen's to Dustin, but not as quickly as he listens to me. Dreizehn could care less where Dustin is and what he's doing but if I make the slightest move he's either watching and/or following me. Dreizehn is also more likely to stand between me and someone creepy than he is with Dustin. I worked really hard to get things this way, however. I'm the only one who feeds him, the only one who trains him, the only one who brushes him, the only one who takes him for walks, and generally the only one who crates and uncrates him.
That was my intention with Diesel but we decided to get him together so I can't say he's all mine haha we did get him a lot for me though when Scott goes away. I dont do well home alone so he's my buddy when it's just me and him but I want that feeling that he'd stand between me and a creepy person doesn't need to defend me just be there. With him being both our dog though I guess I have to share the love
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